No apples were harmed in the baking of this pie.
Perhaps at some point in the distant past, it was possible for a person under the age of 50 to whip up a mock apple pie, hold the irony. Now in an age wherein slowstainable locaheirganic produce is de rigueur in many circles (not mine, but then again, I pour cherry soda all over unsuspecting hams and eat brains from a can) it seems almost viciously retrograde to dump lemony simple syrup on top of a pile of mushed-up crackers and pass it off as fruit.
So don't do that. Just enjoy it for its bizarrely satisfying damp cracker heft. Use, I dunno, heirloom leaf lard in the crust or send a tithe to Michael Pollan if you feel you need to, but really, this pie is in no need of apology.
Get the Ritz Mock Apple Pie recipe after the jump.
Last night I made what I think is one of the top 5 bad food decisions in my life. I went to bed but woke up around 2:30am, incredibly hungry and craving nachos and something cheesy. So I stumbled out of bed and realized that I didn't have any nacho chips and no salsa. What did I do? Why, I used Ritz Crackers instead, of course!
Keebler has been on quite a roll with their TownHouse line of crackers (the 
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