Ladies and gentlemen ... I've traveled over half of New York City's East Village slurping ramen noodles and broth. From Minca Ramen Factory to the city's first truly Japanese ramen-ya, Ramen Setagaya, to David Chang's self-professed "... crappy Pan-Asian ramen made for round-eyes," I have been on the front lines of New York City's so-called ramen wars. So ... ladies and gentlemen ... if I say I am a ramen man you will believe me.

As a ramen man I had been steadfastly waiting for the opening of the East Village outpost of Japan's Hakata Ippudo ever since reading about it on Rameniac. I longed to taste the much heralded soup of the Ramen King Shigemi Kawahara. Ladies and gentleman ... let me assure you it was worth the long wait for Ippudo NY to open. Upon my first visit I was so overcome by the springy noodles and the richness of the long-cooked pork-bone broth in the Shiromaru ramen that I was unable to take a photograph, lest I be separated from my first encounter with ramen ecstasy.

Too lazy to use a knife? Sick of switching back and forth from fork to spoon when you eat your Ramen noodles?

Ah, yes. These dining conundrums have befallen even the best of us at one time or another. The solution?

Enter, crazy new cutlery. The Washington Post's Jane Black reviewed a few new designs that promise to rid us of our dining woes (or, at the very least, provide us with fodder for our next dinner party conversation).

Among the new designs:

• The "Knork," designed to serve as both knife and fork. A little awkward, but helpful for those parties where the you're perched in a corner, attempting to eat off of a tiny paper plate with just a fork.
• Mono Zeug Tools are based on primitive Neanderthal designs, in that the knife is designed to be a piece of honed flint, and the spoon, a variation of a curved oyster shell.
  
• Curvware is designed to be ergonomic so that you don't strain your hand or grip too hard when attempting to, say, cut your steak. Black pronounced it "very comfortable."
• Ramen spoon - Admit it: Ramen noodles can be annoying to eat. This design changes all that, with a spoon for the broth and fork tines for those slippery noodles. And while I wouldn't go so far as to call it "genius," as Block does, it is pretty neat. Unfortunately, you'll have to wait 'til May before you buy it.
  

Check out the video of Black testing out these new tools here.

Last week I wrote about Rameniac, a guide to all things ramen so detailed and descriptive that it left me jonesing for a hot bowl of the stuff. As promised, I did indeed trek from my native Queens to Manhattan's East Village that same afternoon to satisfy my urge.

Rather than head to one of the neighborhood's longstanding ramenyas, I decided to try out Ramen Setagaya, a new spot that opened in mid-June amid much fanfare and accompanying long lines. Part of the reason for all the buzz surrounding Setagaya's opening lies in the fact that it's the first U.S. restaurant of a popular Tokyo chain. And a large part lies in the fact that they make one kickass bowl of soup.

Given my love of Japanese food, and my belief in the restorative powers of slurping down a steaming bowl of authentic ramen, I'm surprised that it took so long for me to happen upon Rameniac. I like to think of this site not as a resource but as the Rosetta Stone of ramen. Given that it lists 22 ramen styles ranging from the country's south all the way to Hokkaido all laid out on a map with links color-coded by soup base (miso, shoyu, shio, etc.), I don't think I'm exaggerating terribly much. There's also a section aptly titled "drooling" that reviews 15 ramenyas, some in Japan and some in the States. Add to that nine reviews of instant ramen, and all of sudden I'm craving a hot bowl of the stuff, even if it is practically August.

By the way the photo above is a bowl of shiromaru, or white sea ramen, from Hakata Ippudo, a chain with several locations in Japan as well as abroad. It's a pork bone soup with thin noodles, chopped green onion, luscious slices of pork and wood-ear mushrooms. This ramen is a specialty of Fukuoka. I have a sneaking suspicion that I'll be heading out to New York City's East Village for some soup in the very near future, as in the next 30 minutes.

The idea of slurping ramen in zero gravity makes me chuckle. I imagine strands of noodles floating around a space capsule while Strauss plays. Clearly that's not the image that the Japan Aerospace Exploration Agency (JAXA) had in mind when it approved 29 foods for use in space earlier this week.

JAXA's spaceworthy menu includes instant ramen noodles, curry, onigiri rice balls, powdered green tea and mackerel in miso sauce. All of the products had to meet the stringent standards of the International Space Station, which include packaging capable of withstanding drastic changes in air pressure and temperature. JAXA hopes that astronaut Koichi Wakata, who will be stationed at the ISS starting in fall of 2008 will get to enjoy the new Japanese space cuisine. Too bad sake and natto did not make the menu.

Each of us hold in our hearts the secret crushes of our lives -- whether it's that barista who flashes you an adorable smile every morning with your nonfat soy decaf latte or an unrequited crush on some B-list celeb. I, however, am not so subtle, and proudly proclaim my utter adoration for Anthony Bourdain. I love the man.

So, I can't tell you how absolutely edamame-green with envy I was to read about LA foodblogger Dylan's encounter with the object of my affection. Dylan writes at Eat, Drink n Be Merry, and also has a food blog on the side dedicated to noodles called Noodle Whore. It was via a post about Sapp Coffee Shop in LA's Thai Town that Tony Bourdain found Dylan, and from there...the rest is jealousy-inducing history. Dylan got to meet Tony while the chef was in LA filming for an episode of his show, which included Sapp Coffee Shop.

Lucky.

If you live on either coast, or even in the Midwest in a major metropolitan area, you'll have no problem finding an Asian grocery store. Korean-specific markets are a little harder to find, and if you're somewhere where there isn't a huge population of Korean people, well, you might find yourself at a loss when a craving for kimchee strikes. You can make it yourself, or you can click over to koaMart, an online Korean food grocer.

Sure, they do the dry, non-perishable goods like ramen and rice, but they can send perishable goods like tofu and kimchee as well. I've never shopped at the store since I live in Los Angeles, but if I were in say, the mountains of Colorado (or really, really lazy) I might give them a try. Shipping isn't cheap, but hey, when you need your pickled, fermented cabbage, you gotta do what you gotta do.

You can't go shopping anywhere these days without being bombarded by "Back to School" sales. Even my local grocery store has "back to school" type foods, like peanut butter and bulk cases of instant ramen, highlighted all over the store. Yes, it's August, and school starts in a few short weeks.

"Back to school" is also in the news, and an article I came across this morning talks about what colleges are now doing to help students avoid the dreaded Freshman 15 - the 15 or so pounds that newly-away-from-home students gain because they're too busy studying to pay attention to what they're eating. Either that, or they're just indulging in pizza beer because they were never allowed to at home.

My freshman year in college, my weight gain was closer to a Freshman 20. Decked out in sweats and overalls about 90% of the time, I didn't really notice the weight gain until Spring. Twenty pounds crept up on me over two semesters at Cal from a simple daily diet of sugar-laden smoothies, Zona Rosa Burritos (I went to Cal), Top Dog, instant ramen, and study break "dates" during final exam fever eating pan-fried noodles drowning in starchy, sugary sauce at late night Chinese joints. But I know that if I had to blame it all one one thing, it would be Fat Slice Pizza.

I've confessed - 20 pounds of fat gained from Fat Slice Pizza. Now it's your turn. What was the real Freshman 15 for you? And how did you get there? "Free" dorm cafeteria food, laden with starch? $1.99 bacon, sausage, and eggs every morning before Econ 101? Beer? Candy? Spill it.

More on college food:
The Eupa Mini Grill is better than George Foreman
Iron your way to a grilled cheese sandwich
Making Osso Bucco in a dorm
Attention starving students! Ramen Taste Test
UC Berkeley offers organic salad bar
Eight college dorm food memories

Forget about the so-called Italian spaghetti western. This time around, Food Movies We Love brings us to Tampopo, the world's first Japanese noodle western.

Written and directed by Juzo Itami, Tampopo tells the story of  Goro (played by Tsutomu Yamazaki) a truck driver/guardian angel who comes to town to help widowed noodlemaker Tampopo (Nobuko Miyamoto) create the greatest fast-food noodle joint Japan has ever seen.

Equal parts Shane, The Seven Samurai and Big Night, Tampopo is a crossover hit. Whether you like art-house movies with subtitles or whether you like noodles, Tampopo is guaranteed to please.

I know that there are plenty of people who enjoy ramen noodles, but I can't help but associate them with the image of a "starving student." Many college-age men and women still rely heavily on this ultra-inexpensive packaged meal. While none can really be considered "health food," they still make a better and more economical meal than relying on McDonald's to get you through lean times.

If you're going to eat it, you may as well make an effort to pick out a good one. The Seattle Post-Intelligencer has done a very comprehensive taste test of one dozen different flavors of Ramen across a range of different brands. Their favorite was the Myojo Chukazanmai Soy Sauce flavor, while the Ve Wong Peppered Beef is one to be avoided at all costs, especially since one taster described it as "the worst instant noodle I've ever tasted in my life." Read the whole review for a rundown of the all options, with critiques of the various flavorings and noodle quality.

Say "Japanese food" and right away, most people will think of sushi, perhaps immediately followed by tempura, teriyaki, and ramen. Increasingly, people are also becoming familiar with kushiyaki, the assortment of grilled, skewered foods that are traditionally served as "bar-snacks." However, there's another Japanese cuisine, shabu shabu.

The words "shabu shabu" roughly translates to "swish swish," as that is the way food is cooked: diners briefly swish paper-thin slices of raw meat and chopped fresh vegetables in a pot of boiling water to cook them. It's similar to fondue in that diners are "dipping" foods in a liquid in front of them, and similar also to Korean barbecue, where diners are essentially grilling the meat themselves at the table. Sometimes each individual diner has their own pot of boiling water, and other times, an entire table of diners share a community pot in the center of the table.

Once the meat or vegetable is cooked, it is dipped in a light, thin ponzu sauce, or a thick, sweet sesame sauce. An entire meal usually includes a plate of vegetables, tofu, noodles, and some sort of meat: thinly-sliced ribeye, chicken, or seafood like lobster, crab or other shellfish. 

There are quite a few Japanese shabu shabu places:

Central:

• Shabu Shabu House, 127 Japanese Village Plaza, Los Angeles, CA 90012, (213) 680-3890
• Kushi Shabu, 123 Onizuka St Ste 305, Los Angeles, CA 90012, (213) 621-0210

Westside:

• Mizu 212, 2000 Sawtelle Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90025, (310)478-8979
• Shabu Hachi, 11680 W Olympic Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90064, (310) 479-7537

East

• Lee's Shabu, 18438 Colima Rd Ste 318, Rowland Heights, CA
• Dai Kei Sushi and Shabu, 708 E Las Tunas Dr, San Gabriel, CA 91776, (626) 285-5701

South and OC

• Shabu Shabu Gyushintei, 24631 Crenshaw Blvd, Torrance, CA, 90505, (310) 326-2438
• Koji's Shabu Shabu, @ the Block@Orange, Orange, CA 92868 (714) 769-0200
• California Shabu Shabu, 18908 Brookhurst St, Fountain Valley, CA 92708, (714) 963-8844   

MSN's report on the Worst Foods to Eat got us to thinking about what our list might be. MSN has nothing on us here at Slashfood. While we think that living a vegetarian or vegan lifestyle is a great choice, unlike MSN “health” advisors, we don’t think it’s the only way to live. We put on our Slash Foodie un-scientifical research hats and here are our picks for 8 of the worst foods you can eat:

• Deep fried Snickers or Mars bars - This "snack" packs over 450 calories and about 30 grams of fat, and a king size will deliver more than 700 calories and 44 grams of fat. What's more disturbing is that some pubs plate them with a side of fries and call them lunch.
• Shelf stable “creamers” – Water, sugar or corn syrup solids and partially hydrogenated oils make up this shelf-stable faux cream. Need we say more?
• Pasteurized, processed cheese food - No, we don’t care how well they melt. These melty, spreadable, day-glo orange “cheeses” have to be labeled as “cheese food” because of the addition of preservatives and liquids. Yum.

After an early evening happy hour in which the primary fuel was from the liquid family and most likely rhymes with "modka," along with a few side dishes of traditional or not-so-traditional bar foods, you probably don't have enough room for a full dinner. But you have to eat something, otherwise, you'll wake up with a sour stomach and a raging headache.

When I was in college, the late night half-meal was usually ramen, eaten strictly due to circumstance and not by choice. In the instant form, ramen was the cheapest food around, and the least complicated thing to make at home. Nowadays, I seek out the true ramen, with long-simmered stocks that re-hydrate and handmade noodles that seem to "soak up" and excess liquor in my stomach. Of course, I still pour hot sauce into my bowl or shower it with hot pepper powder.

Asian instant noodle soups is a German blog that reviews various instant noodle products. If you've ever searched through an Asian supermarket in a quest to find instant noodles, you know it's simply ridiculous to try to wade through the insane multitude of the different products. Although the Google translation is a bit weak at times, you can browse through looking at the various scores to find out which noodles might be worth a try. Seriously, I haven't even heard of half of these brands, let alone know what they taste like (and trust me, there are a lot of disappointing noodles out there).

One of my favorite San Francisco ramen restaurants, Sapporo-Ya Ramen, is the perfect place to warm up on a drizzly day. Located in Japantown, which is more known for its touristy restaurants that its authentic ones (although there are a few stand-outs), Sapporo-Ya cranks out tasty bowls of noodle soup which feature chewy, housemade noodles.

When my daughters and I walked in today, the noodle maker was at work in the front of the restaurant, stretching and flouring ramen noodles. It was hard to decide between all the different types of ramen: was I in the mood for plain ramen like shio (salt), shoyu (soy sauce), or char siu (roasted pork)? Or did I want a little more embellishment in the form of miso or butter ramen (which contains a hint of butter)? In the end I chose a spicy kim chee ramen which is essentially plain ramen (spinach, hard boiled egg, bamboo shoots, a slice of char siu, and a sprinkling of green onions) topped with a mound of fiery, Korean pickled cabbage and thinly sliced turnip. The broth was perfectly salty and gingery. The noodles luscious. The kim chee added just the right amount of bite.

My girls split an order of pork yakisoba—ramen noodles which have been stirfried with a sweet sauce and served topped with nori furikake (seasoned seaweed flakes) and a side of vibrant red pickled ginger. They inhaled theirs and split some green tea ice cream for dessert. Today it's rainy and gray in San Francisco, but we had fun exploring Japantown and having lunch together. Happiness for me truly is a bowl of noodles.