"peta" news and stories

"Dear Mr. Clooney," begins the PETA letter. "We have been offered some of your perspiration, apparently taken from a towel at a gym in Washington, D.C...this prospect has given us an interesting idea...The technology actually exists to take your perspiration and make it into George Clooney-flavored tofu (CloFu)...CloFu will help people be more healthy and environmentally friendly and will spare animals from being killed for the table...The science is pretty straightforward...if you use a sample of human perspiration, it is 'no different than making artificial chicken flavor for instant gravy.'"

I'm pretty sure PETA's kidding about this one, a mere publicity stunt to promote tofu while showing us that "chicken flavoring" is just as gross and weird as "human flavoring." Right? Right?

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Fish are not particularly cuddly animals: they lack warmth, fur, scratchy tongues, and personalities. They don't seem to show much interest in cuddling with humans, playing with catnip, or generally engaging in fun, photogenic activities.

The People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) recently came to the conclusion that this lack of cuddliness is the reason that so many people eat fish. Consequently, they have begun a campaign to rename the aquatic beasts "sea kittens." As campaign coordinator Ashley Byrne notes, "Most parents would never dream of spending a weekend torturing kittens for fun with their families, but hooking a sea kitten through the mouth and dragging her through the water is the same as hooking a kitten through the mouth and dragging her behind your car."

This argument, admittedly, brings to mind about a million rebuttals, but I am inclined to let the differences between fish and kittens speak for themselves. It seens necessary to point out, however, that cats are friendlier than fish and that fish (aka "tofu of the sea") are far stupider than cats. Moreover, while fish taste like fish, my experience has shown that cats actually taste like sesame chicken.

The vigilant folks at PETA are really straining at the boundaries of good taste.

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals recently sent a letter to Ben & Jerry Homemade, Inc. co-founders Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, asking them to consider using human breast milk instead of cow's milk in their products.

How did this idea pop up? A restaurant in Switzerland decided to make soups, sauces and other delicacies using 75% human breast milk. If it's a good idea for one Swiss restaurant, it's good enough for a mass-market, (albeit right-on) maker of ice creams. You have to give credit to PETA for seizing a PR opportunity when it finds it .

"If Ben and Jerry's replaced the cow's milk in its ice cream with breast milk," wrote the animal rights group in its letter, "your customers-and cows-would reap the benefits."

Ben & Jerry's, which made a name for itself in the '90s by running its business on progressive, pro-environment practices, is one of the few mainstream companies that might even "consider" a proposal like this.

Unfortunately, it's got product to push. And eye-popping though this idea may be, it's not exactly lip-smacking. Putting aside the health debate surrounding dairy products, I feel fairly secure in saying that the American public is not likely to find the idea of human breast milk ice cream as titillating as the Swiss might.

But I could be wrong.

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As one chef put it, "We're going to paint the town with foie gras."

Um, that might be taking it a little far, but okay.

After just over a year of the law that banned restaurants from serving foie gras, the city of Chicago has done an about-face, making the fatty liver of ducks and geese available to diners. Many parties are involved with the issue of serving foie gras in Chicago restaurants, from animal rights activists to restaurant owners to foie gras producers, and even to those interested in the political process in Chicago's city administration.

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Time to check in with our sister site GreenDaily for some environmental/food news:

• Water bottles: filters on the go; why we probably don't need as much water as everyone says we do

• Produce: not enough land to grow local stuff?; neighborhood gardening; cantaloupe salmonella scare; raw food safety tips; urban agriculture at its finest; try what one poster calls a "superfood berry"; how far has your fruit traveled?
  

• Milk: California might ban it; buy the best container; try organic; consumers fight back

• Chocolate is even better with when it comes complete with antioxidants and carbon offsets

• Junk Food: Cadbury goes green; organic ice cream; Sun Chips get sunnier
  

• Ball parks: all-you-can-eat seating; will the Nationals stadium be named after PETA?