OK, let's be honest. Who hasn't thought she could do better than the people behind the Sweethearts slogans: "Call Me"? "Cloud Nine"? "Amore"? Please.

The folks at the New England Confectionery Co. have heeded your collective cry, so it's time to take to the Internet, poets, lovers and sugarcrazed civilians! In February 2010, every single one of those hearts will be named not by stuffy boardroom types, but by us commoners.

What's in it for you? Oh, you know, one lucky toothless person will win 1.6 million sweethearts that say whatever she wants them to say.

Learn how to win, after the jump.

We wrote earlier about Necco's new Conversation Hearts with foodie sayings. Well Conversation Hearts have popped up again on our interwebs today, this time in the form of artist Nathan Sawaya's Necco Human Heart. Oh yes, this is indeed an anatomically correct heart made up of hundreds of pink, yellow and purple Conversation Hearts. Sawaya writes: "I'm not a fan of Valentine's Day. It is a made up holiday and makes more people feel sad than happy. It can make your heart feel vulnerable. Almost edible." Amen.

Ever since I was a kid, I have loved the little sweethearts conversation hearts that Necco releases each year. Though they still produce some of the original sayings like "be mine" and "sweet talk", each year they add something new to the mix.

For 2007, they have joined forces with the Massachusetts Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (MSPCA) and released ten new "pet-friendly" sayings including "love bird", "bear hug", "purr fect", and "puppy love".

Did you know that you can have Necco custom imprint hearts with your own special message on them? Be warned though, you have to be willing to buy a full production run. According to their website, that is approximately 3,500 pounds of the six-flavored candies, or 1.6 million individual hearts. Or, you can just do what the rest of us do and buy the ones that they have already made.

Other than the actual sayings, the best part about the hearts is that they are fat-free, sodium-free, and only contain three calories per small heart and six calories per large heart. So, next time someone asks you to "be mine", "take a walk", or "kiss me", you can do so without guilt.

Ask almost any kid what the lowest candy on the totem pole is and they will tell you wafer candies - assuming that they can even come up with the name of the category. These candies, which include the US Smarties (not the chocolate UK kind) and Necco Wafers, are made of pressed sugar and don't have nearly as much to recommend them as some of the chocolate, peanut butter and caramel candies that they have to compete with. That being said, however, they have been around for a long time and even if they are not the most popular candies, they always get eaten.

It's possible that the flavors have something to do with their inevitable consumption. One of the unusual things about these candies is that the coloring does not necessarily correspond to flavoring and that there are few cross-brand parallels. Lis of Riba's Ramblings put together a flavor vs. color comparison chart for four types of "popular" wafer candies - SweeTarts, Smarties, Necco Wafers and Sweethearts - so you'll know what it is that you're eating. Pink candies could be cherry or wintergreen. White wafers could be orange cream, cinnamon or mint. Green could be strawberry, lemon, lime or apple. The only color/flavor that was the same across the board was orange. Check out the rest of the table for a full breakdown.

We love those conversation hearts from Necco (and, what the heck, the knockoffs too, whether they be bitter or sweet or plain obnoxious). When I was a little girl whose head was filled with images of princess hats, men on white horses, and endless gifts of Whitman's Samplers and sugary candy and roses for Valentine's Day, I imagined the time when my sweetheart would express his love with those sweet, sweet hearts.

But it's never really happened as in my dream. When my husband proposed? It wasn't by handing me a candy heart imprinted in pink smudged block letters with "MARRY ME."

Has that ever happened, to you or someone you know? Please do share.

[Photo Sarah Gilbert]

Necco unveiled its annual newbies amongst the sayings which festoon its iconic Valentine candy hearts today. The coolest in my book are hearts featuring the words "and" and "to" so hungry lovers can create phrases such as the suggested "kiss me to be mine" or my own, spur-of-the-moment creation, "UR kind to be true to my baby and website."

Each new year brings with it a special theme. Last year: sports. Bor-ing. This year, in keeping with the thousands of troops who aren't, is home. New phrases include "home soon," "go home," "call home," "sweet home," and the slightly risque "home run" and "house party." Finally, Necco added "ILU" for you text-messaging sweethearts (if I have to explain that to you, you SO don't need that heart).