I've seen some pretty bizarre drinks in my time, but InventorSpot.com's Soft Drink Hell of Fame inductees may top just about anything we've shared on these virtual pages to date. Joe already pointed us in the direction of Pepsi Ice Cucumber a few days ago, and though it made this list as well, is definitely the most normal beverage of the bunch. So without further ado...

For those of you concerned about your weight, fear not! - Diet Water is now available on the shelves. You know, as opposed to the regular, calorie-laden bottles of water that we all consume daily. (Half of nothing is still nothing, right?) If plain water isn't exciting enough for you, then you could also purchase Water Salad - the brainchild of a little beverage company called Coca-Cola. Like they say at InventorSpot - is this the stuff that is left over in your salad spinner?

Next up is Coolpis and Calpis. (Yes, just sound them out.) Though the names alone are enough to keep me away, Coolpis is actually a Kimchee-flavored beverage. Now I love Kimchee - but in a drink?

For those of you hardcore gamers out there working up a sweat rolling 16-sided dice, Final Fantasy has released their own line of potions drinks so you can quench your thirst as you play along.

There are many, many more, believe it or not, including Mother's Milk (complete with a picture of a breastfeeding child on the carton) and KidsBeer - yes, KidsBeer - which you can find over at their site.

(thanks, Michelle!)
Images via InventorsSpot.com

I think this package says it all. I picked up a pound of maple sausage, the delectable links that my family has always called "breakfast sausage" without allowing a title to limit our consumption. No, we eat it from dawn 'til dusk, despite its moniker.

Evidently, Fred Meyer (our local grocery and part of the Kroger gi-nomerate) is worried that the name "breakfast sausage" will limit more conservative families to (horrors!) eat it only during breakfast. They've changed the label so it reads, "maple flavored sausage" and "delicious anytime!"

Thank you, Fred Meyer, for freeing us -- and our sausages -- from the shackles of breakfast.

A Japanese sake company noticed that its master brewers always had such nice skin! So Ozeki asked 11 employees to drink sake (270 millileters, to be exact) and measure the moisture in their skin before and after. Moisture content of their arms grew by 30%, compared to no change when drinking another alcoholic beverage.

The employees may have gotten sloshed, but it was for a good cause! Now several Japanese companies are developing sake-based skincare products. Evidently, there are 36 active substances in the sake-derived extracts produced by Yushin-Brewer, which contains koji mold, lactic acid bacteria and yeast. Yushin-Brewer is also making an anti-ulcer product. And I have no idea how that relates to having moist skin, but there you go.

I think I'd rather just get the lovely skin effects from drinking the sake. You?

It's hip to eat savory ice creams, and if you go to a food festival you're bound to see something in the creamy, cold category no matter what the topic - even, yes, garlic. But octopus, that's an ice cream I've never either (a) tried or (b) cared to try. Jason from Damn Interesting agrees, and says: "damnit, we have to draw a line, and Octopus Ice Cream would have to be on the far side of that line."

Watch Iron Chef and you're bound to see some strange ice creams. Sure, sure, that's a spur-of-the-moment exercise in bizarro creativity. But this is a packaged variety available commercially. Does it sell? Has anyone tried it?

We know there's always been weird food out there, ever since man first started pounding tiny bits of grain to make a fine powder, mixing it with naturally-occurring bacteria and warm liquid expressed from an animal, letting it sit for a couple of hours, heating it up, and eating it (boy, bread's weird, isn't it?).

But there are some places that even we, jaded food lovers that we are, don't imagine finding food. Let's take wounds, for one. In 2005, Slashfood discovered the Bacon bandaids. Take data storage devices, for two. This week we learned of the strange-yet-wonderful sushi USB drives. Then, there's your lips, who see a lot of food, on the way in. But they don't see much food, well, just sitting around healing your wind-burned kisser. Now they can, thanks to Cheetos chapstick. You think these are weird? That is so not all.