Artie's Deli in New York held its annual turkey-eating contest last Wednesday, just before Thanksgiving. Each contestant was given a fully-cooked 12-pound turkey and the goal was to see who could eat the most in 12 minutes. Competitive eating champion Pat Bertoletti walked away from his competition, eating a full pound more meat than his closest rival and reaching a total of 4.8 pounds. Competitive eating fans might be surprised to know that Sonya Thomas, aka the black widow and the defending turkey-eating champ, was also competing. Unfortunately, she was disqualified after getting so much turkey into her mouth that she was unable to swallow. Bertoletti, for his part, said that he had a specific strategy that helped him. He started with the white meat because it was harder to chew, so that his jaw would have enough energy to get through it before moving onto the softer, moister dark meat. The runners up included Tim Janus (3.8 lbs), Arturo Rios (2.8 lbs) and Crazy Legs Conti (2.38 lbs).

I haven't posted anything about competitive eating in a while, but, for a number of reasons, this is too good to pass up. A recent post to the International Federation of Competitive Eating website mentioned next weekend's World Posole Eating Championship at the Sky City Casino in Acoma, New Mexico. I'm a big posole fan, but I never knew it was something that was eaten competitively. If you've visited the IFOCE site in the past, you might be familiar with competitive eater Rich "The Locust" LeFevre. Rich will be competing next weekend, but it turns out that his wife Carlene (right) was the star of the competition two years ago, when she became the "world posole champ" by eating almost 110 ounces of of the spicy pork and hominy soup in 12 minutes. Her husband finished with about 10 ounces less than that. Carlene won't be competing this time around, but her husband Rich will, along with competitive eater Pat Bertoletti.

"There's nothing like putting yourself through a lot of pain for no reason."

Truer words were never spoken - especially not if you're an amateur about to enter a Jalapeño-eating contest sponsored by the International Federation of Competitive eating, pitting yourself against professional gurgitators. The contest was held on Sunday at the State Fair of Texas and included 6 amateurs against pros Rich LeFevre, Sonya Thomas, Pat Bertoletti and Erik Denmark. Jalapeños are a particularly difficult food to eat because, although they are small, they can be quite painful. Some eaters reported a loss of feeling in their faces and a general dizziness, in addition to sickness, after the competition was over. The pros used some tricks that they picked up on the circuit, including drinking Pepto Bismol before the competition and using milk, rather than water, to dull the burn of the peppers' oils. Unsurprisingly, the well-prepared pros came out on top:

• First place: Rich "The Locust" LeFevre, 247 jalapeños
• Second: Sonya "The Black Widow" Thomas, 239
• Third: Pat "Deep Dish" Bertoletti, 226

For comparison, the amateurs seemed to average around 50 or so.

This week, competitive eater Pat Bertoletti set a new ice cream-eating world record by consuming 1.75 gallons in eight minutes. The ice cream used was vanilla from the Brooklyn Ice Cream Factory.  Bertoletti, fourth in eater rankings,  also holds the records for key lime pie, chocolate and corned beef and cabbage.

It is possible to image eating almost any food quickly, even if you can't really conceive of doing it yourself. Ice cream, on the other hand, is not an easy food to eat because of the risk of brain freeze, the intense headache that results from consuming cold foods too quickly. Some of the eaters appeared to be affected by the cold, but Bertoletti ate the ice cream as though it were no colder than a pile of warm mashed potatoes. I'm not sure if "impressive" fully describes the performance, but watch the video to see for yourself.