This doesn't quite apply to me because I wake up before sunrise without an alarm (probably because I have coffee pulsing through my veins in place of blood), but for anyone who happens to be "morning impaired," the Society for the Morning Impaired wants to bribe you out of bed with a free Sausage McGriddle from McDonald's. You sign up to join the society, then supposedly an electronic coupon appears in your email inbox. We say "supposedly" because we tried to sign up -- we may not be morning impaired but we fall all over ourselves for anything off of McDonalds' breakfast menu -- and were told that the offer is not available in our area (we're on LA's westside). Obviously, this is a marketing program from McDonald's but we certainly don't have a problem with that. Market away if it means free food!

[via: Bargainist]

Earlier this week the Houston Chronicle's Drive-Thru Gourmet turned his attention to Dunkin' Donuts. Specifically, he sampled the chain's new French Toast Twist.

As most of you out there know America's No. 1 doughnut maker has been trying to recast its image all year. One of the ways it's cooked up to do this is taking a page from fast-food chains. Sounds like the French Toast Twist is squarely within this mold.

The author is quick to point out that the French Toast Twist falls outside Dunkin's bread-and-butter business of bagels, doughnuts and muffins. It's not really French toast either.

That said it sounds pretty good. What could be wrong with rolls of flaky pastry with French toast flavors baked in? Sure it sounds like a McGriddle, but at least there's no logo emblazoned on it. And they're available all day. Note to self: Visit Dunkin' for 2 p.m. hangover breakfast after attending Brewtopia tonight.

Sure, the fast food industry has recently spurred non-fiction books, documentaries and plenty of investigative journalism, but fan fiction? In a similar vein to the LiveJournal community of McDonald's employees, here's an LJ community composed solely of fan fiction based around the McGriddle breakfast sandwich. Really. There's some sci-fi, some suspense, even McGriddle haiku and jokes. For instance: "Q: What do you get when you line up 8 McGriddle Breakfast Sandwiches in a row? A: MMMMMMMM!" I also particularly enjoyed the short story involving the Hamburgler reflecting on his past while "Lying in his cell, doing a "dollar value menu" upstate."

Burger King now has its own variation on the McDonald's McGriddle. Instead of swathing a sandwich in syrup-filled pancakes, the new French Toast Sandwich uses - you guessed it: french toast. Sandwiched between two round slices of maple-flavored, deep fried french toast is an egg, sausage and cheese filling.

The official nutritional information doesn't appear to be available yet, but it should probably receive honorable mention on the list of the worst foods you can eat. To estimate the fat and calories, I added up the nutritional information for the filling of the Egg, Sausage and Cheese Croissan'wich  (310 calories and 26 grams of fat) and the 5-pc. French Toast Sticks (390 calories and 20 grams of fat) and came up with 700 calories and 46 grams of fat. If it turns out to be anywhere near those numbers, that puts it at about the same fat and calorie content of the Enormous Omelet Sandwich. Yum.

MSN's report on the Worst Foods to Eat got us to thinking about what our list might be. MSN has nothing on us here at Slashfood. While we think that living a vegetarian or vegan lifestyle is a great choice, unlike MSN “health” advisors, we don’t think it’s the only way to live. We put on our Slash Foodie un-scientifical research hats and here are our picks for 8 of the worst foods you can eat:

• Deep fried Snickers or Mars bars - This "snack" packs over 450 calories and about 30 grams of fat, and a king size will deliver more than 700 calories and 44 grams of fat. What's more disturbing is that some pubs plate them with a side of fries and call them lunch.
• Shelf stable “creamers” – Water, sugar or corn syrup solids and partially hydrogenated oils make up this shelf-stable faux cream. Need we say more?
• Pasteurized, processed cheese food - No, we don’t care how well they melt. These melty, spreadable, day-glo orange “cheeses” have to be labeled as “cheese food” because of the addition of preservatives and liquids. Yum.