"HippieNutritionist" news and stories

Having not even met you, let me say this: you don't eat enough vegetables. Yeah, sure you eat loads of salads -- if you call a handful of watery lettuce dipped in oil a "salad" -- but according to the health professionals, you need three to twelve cups of broccoli and spinach a day just to be "average!" Those damned smug holistic nutritionists! Do you think even they eat that much? Do you think they spend half their day holding their nose and quaffing down carefully measured cuploads of soggy broccoli? And no, a tofu burger doesn't count as vegetables. And yes, I too hate even thinking about satisfying my hunger at the diner with a side order of sautéed spinach when everyone else is having cheese fries.

Don't think that slamming one of these $3 green juices at the deli is going to satisfy that measuring cup-crazed nutritionist in the back of your mind. And here's something else: raw fresh vegetables and fresh fruit don't mix. Eat them at the same time and you are asking for trouble… gastric, gaseous trouble. I remember temping at this ad agency about ten years ago; it was lunch time and I was about to eat my random assemblage from the Chinese salad bar deli next door: fresh strawberries, big vegetarian sushi roll, and fresh, raw broccoli. A visiting hippie chick friend of mine, the sort who has read Diet for a New America all the way through, gave me a look of concern as she and my co-worker went out to lunch. When they came back she took one look at my pale, agonized, bloated face and told me she had been worried about my mixing all through her lunch, and that I should never mix raw fruit and vegetables in the same meal.

She was a hippie nutritionist chick, and she knew.