Ahh, Twix. The pinnacle of snackitecture. I mean, a buttery cookie draped with caramel, then cloaked in milk chocolate? And then to have not one, but two bars in each package?! Frank Gehry himself could not have constructed a more impressive confectionery structure.
Now, I usually see no reason to mess with excellence, but those evil geniuses over at Mars have a history of riffing on perfection. Case in point: TwixPB. With peanut butter in lieu of caramel and a chocolate cookie base, it is a decadent, special occasion kind of Twick.
Given this example, I do not deign to question Mars' judgment. So when I found Twix Java (boasting coffee caramel and chocolate cookie covered in milk chocolate), I didn't recoil in horror. Instead, I chose to embrace their vision and put my faith in the Artificial Flavorteers.
Although Twix Java is by no means better than Twix original, it is successful in its own right. The coffee flavor is so bright (it tastes the way Sanka smells), it actually pairs well with the slapdash chocolate cookie and milk chocolate robe. Think of it as a Starbucks caramel mocha in candy bar form: A bastardization of many great things, but so trashily delicious, you just don't care.
It's been 38 years since Boy first asked Mr. Owl how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. And for the past 38 years, Mr. Owl has unflinchingly maintained that it only takes "...a-one ...a-two-hoo! ...a-three." But as we all know, Mr. Owl is a filthy cheater who bites on three.
Tootsie Pops' new "How Many Licks" sweepstakes asks you to submit your own confection calculations. Just visit AskMrOwl.biz and fill out a short entry form with your lick estimate. One grand prize winner will receive $50,000 (and a bonus $5,000 if they guess within 3% of the average licks calculated from all entries combined). Sweeter odds lie in monthly drawings which award five entrants with 27 pounds of assorted Tootsie Roll goodies.
Keep in mind, owls usually only live until 40, so this may be your last chance to prove Mr. Owl wrong before he bites it for the last time. Have any of you (other than Sisqo) conducted the "How Many Licks" experiment?
You know what I love most about America? The way that we have a holiday for everything. And even when we run out of holidays, we just make up more holidays and continue using them as excuses to glut. And when it's a food holiday, we are officially permissed to double-gorge! So here's a heads-up for my favorite August food holidays -- y'know, so you can get your shopping done early and beat the mad holiday rush.
August 1 - Raspberry Cream Pie Day: This shortcut Chilled Raspberry Cream Pie recipe from Rachael Ray can be whipped up in a jif. It'll be just like one of those No-Bake commercials when your friends and family are fawning over you for spending the day slaving over the stove while you're secretly sniggering to yourself, "Heh heh, it was no bake, you fools!"
August 2 - Ice Cream Sandwich Day: Sure, you could wade through the freezer case, or you could man up and make your own. Consider these decadent peanut-butter-'n'-honey-flavored "Bee-Nut Butter Ice Cream Sandwiches" from Domestic Goddess.
Some say that Heath Ledger's chilling performance as The Joker is the best thing about The Dark Knight. But I dare say that the best thing about The Dark Knight is its promotional Special Edition Reese's Peanut Butter Bat.
Before I get to that, I must expound my philosophy: Reese's Special Edition Cups (which also include Halloween Reese's Peanut Butter Pumpkin and Easter Reese's Peanut Butter Egg) consistently trump traditional cups because they have a higher peanut butter to chocolate ratio. See, classic Cups are weighed down by the shell's chocolate crimping, which leaves us peanut butter lovers pining. But Special Edition Cups forgo the frills and pack as much PB as possible into a thin chocolate casing. In fact, if we're really getting down to brass tacks, Egg beats Pumpkin solely because Pumpkin has the little all-chocolate stem at the top.
This recent post about Starbucks - as with most posts about Starbucks - caused the typical coffee cacophony over price and quality. Although I happen to like Starbucks just fine, I certainly appreciate a good homemade cup. Unfortunately, quality espresso machines are pricey and people rarely use them enough to meet their ROI ('Fess up: How many of you have a schmancy DeLonghi at home, but still go to Starbucks every day?). As a veteran barista (of both indie and corporate coffeehouses), I've come up with a stock of supplies to help make gourmet coffee at home.
Espresso drinks:
Moka pot (like this one from Bialetti): Many Italians still brew their espresso the old-fashioned way -- on the stovetop. The pot steeps espresso grounds in boiling water until the bubbles force the creamy coffee into the top of the Moka. Pour it out, and there's your shot.
Milk Frother (like this one from Aerolatte): This bad boy has a high-speed whisker that whips any kind of milk into foamy shape. (For a cappuccino, use half steamed milk/half foam; for a latte, use mainly steamed milk, with a layer of foam on top).
Some associate San Francisco with Rice-A-Roni, cable cars, and the gay lib movement. I, however, take the shallow route and associate it with fine American chocolate. Between The San Francisco Chocolate Factory and Ghirardelli, San Fran is just about the only city in the contiguous United States that produces decent corporate chocolate. [Note that I said corporate; there are plenty of lovely indie chocolate shops around.]
To wit: Upon her return from the golden state, a colleague presented me with The San Francisco Chocolate Factory's new "Book Lover's Chocolate". The bookshelf-ready packaging evokes an old leather-bound novel (albeit a tiny one, at only 5 inches), and contains rounds of milk chocolate (also available in dark and dark espresso). The schpeel: "Chocolate has been proven to boost brain power, so let our luscious bite sized discs help you devour your new book while pleasing your palate." Uh, okay, whatever you say, Book Chocolate.
But lo, this book chocolate is divine! The disc shape is perfectly contoured for mindless tongue-palate melting (no impatient biting here!), and the flavor is so creamy and rich, they're like little poppable drinking chocolates. I also test-drove the chocolate's promise of enhancing any reading experience, and while they didn't make the oeuvre of Ann Coulter any more digestible, they sure make it more palatable.
Wheaties may be the breakfast of Champions, but are you the champion of breakfast cereals? See if you can identify Cocoa Pebbles from Cocoa Krispies and Cap'n Crunch from Kix. Crunch your way through this quiz, and then come back here to share your score and dish on your favorite cereals!
There are few corporations as polarizing as Starbucks. Even on this blog, it is the rare Slashbucks post that doesn't incite a ruthless comments war. Yet there is no denying that Starbucks is a fast food force and their products deserve coverage like everybody else, so simmer.
Today Starbucks is introducing yet another beverage to their liquid arsenal. Though frozen and blended, the new Vivanno isn't another tired variation on the -ccino theme. Nope, this is Starbucks' answer to Jamba Juice: A protein-packed smoothie.
Here's the scoop:
One whole - real! - banana (seriously! it will be peeled and pulsed before your very eyes!)
Whey protein (16 grams) and fiber powder (5 grams)
Choice of milk (default is 2%)
Ice
Secret Starbucks-Proprietary Orange-Mango Naked Juice
Portion controlled (default is Grande, and always has less than 270 calories)
Although I believe it is rather naive of the financially-woed coffee conglomerate to try and break into the oversaturated smoothie market with a mere four options, I decided to give 'em a go.
Man alive! I've been so busy drinking all of the coffee within a 10 block radius that I didn't even notice 2008's greatest trend: Cooking with coffee! Though long favored for desserts (such as the awe-inspiring, diabetic-coma-inducing Doughnuts and Coffee Cupcakes from Cupcakeblog.com, above), coffee had never really struck me as a viable ingredient for sauces, marinades, crusts and the like. But apparently, people are pilin' on the Columbian grounds like it's freakin' salt'n'pepper. Below, eight recipes I intend to take black:
It's only July 3rd and my foodie forefathers have already dished out plenty of Independence Day eats in such posts as American Flag Cakes and Delicious Foods for July 4th. But let's be honest: There is no food or cake that can rival the great American tradition of getting rip-roaring drunk. Even Uncle Sam's cheeks wear a warm flush!
But tradition aside, I do not condone drinking to excess, so I have devised a list of patriotic cocktails that are too lovely to chug. In the words of the great George Washington as he crossed the Delaware: Take it slow, kids, take it slow.
Starfruit and Stripes Daiquiri - The fine folks at MaisonBisson came up with this capital idea: Take a traditional strawberry daiquiri, top it with whipped cream and blueberries, then garnish with a slice of starfruit. Ta da! Liquid flag!
Red, White and Blue Sangria - Punctuate some white sangria with blueberries and raspberries for that good ol' U.S. of A. color scheme.
Boston Pops Martini - This Massachusetts-made martini celebrates the famed Boston Pops' national independence day broadcast. The true fireworks begin with the rim that's dipped in - what else? - Pop Rocks!
Red, White and Blue Shot - Although there are a number of variations on this popular Fourth of July shooter, the key is a careful pour to ensure those colors don't run.
Patriotic Margarita - The arbiters of blue vodka put their hued booze to good use with this layered margarita: HPNOTIQ 'rita, topped with strawberry 'rita, dressed up with a coconut rim.
Red, White and Blue beers - According to the results of this poll, beer is the bev of choice for cookouts. So if you want to keep with the patriotic theme, stock up on PBR (in the unmistakable red, white, and blue can) or for something a bit classier, invest in an assortment of Chimay Red, Chimay White, and Chimay Blue.
If you are declaring an independence from alcohol, whip up one of these constitutions:
Patriotic Tea Punch - Try out this tart punch that boasts an iced tea base, pomegranate juice, and gobs of fresh fruit.
Bomb Pop Mocktail - This red, white, and blue pousse-cafe layers cranberry juice, blue Gatorade, and diet 7-up to mimic everyone's favorite patriotic popsicle.
There has been an overwhelming response to AOL's round up of America's Most Hated Foods. I mean, people are vomiting through their computers and damning foods to illegality (poor cooked carrots). I've gotta admit, I don't have any aversions that strong. Sure, I have foods I dislike (I'm lookin at you, Mr. Sun-Dried Tomato), but nothing that is going to make me weep into my dinner plate.
That said, I do have a pretty serious issue with seasonal food hatred. Certain foods that I enthusiastically eat all winter long just cannot cross my plate during the summer.
Mint-Chocolate. As stated in this M&M review, mint-chocolate means wintry warmth. Although there has been accusation that I got this association from Starbucks (damn you, Grande Soy Mint Mocha!), I maintain that this comes from Christmas' candy cane cataclysm.
Potato Soup. Obviously, it's hot. But what's worse, it's dense, and starchy, and thick, and kinda fuzzy. These are not acceptable adjectives for summer outerwear, let alone my internal organs.
Breakfast sausage. Now, I'm all about a sausage on a bun; toss on some spicy mustard and it's a par-tay. But a girthy link of meat just sitting on my plate first thing in the morning, waiting for a greasy, snappy bite to set it free? Hell no.
Ice cream is the great equalizer. Every person from every walk of life loves ice cream. (Except for lactose intolerant people, but they're obviously being punished by God.)
While it's perfectly acceptable to march into Baskin-Robbins and demand a triple cone of Jamoca Almond Fudge (you weirdos), or dive head-first into the Haagen-Dazs freezer for a pint of Sticky Toffee Pudding (you English people), wouldn't it feel exponentially more gratifying to make your own?
Scrolling through my daily Thrillist email blast, I found a tout for "Sommelier Wine Glasses." Ever feigning an earnest and legitimate interest/knowledge of wine, I clicked through, only to find this truly stellar stemware.
These kegger-cups-cum-wine-glasses are ideally suited for people like me who pretend to care about Viticulture, but are actually throwin' back jugs of Carlo Rossi.
Just remember, these are hand-blown glass, so try and refrain from playing Wine Pong. (Or worse, Flip Cup.)
As much as I abhor the tradition, Slashfood would be remiss to not cover Family Circle's famous would-be-First-Wives Cookie Bake-Off. 'Cause nothing reflects a man's ability to run the United States like his wife's baking skills! But misogyny aside, the winning cookie recipe has, indeed, accurately predicted the White House winner for four elections running. And, interestingly enough, all four of said recipes have riffed on America's love affair with oats'n'chips. Oh Americans, so set in your ways.
Politics aside, I am predisposed to Obama's Shortbread Cookies. Although the pictures on Family Circle make them look a bit like unappetizing li'l fruit cake slices, the dried fruit is optional, so really, it's just shortbread spiked with zest and almondy alcohol. Um, yes please.
Who are you voting for? Keep it to cookies, please, no need for political drama in a foodie forum!
I am all about pickles. One of my favorite eating sensations is when you chomp into a kosher dill and the sweet-salty brine makes your cheeks cave in. Yeah, that's good stuff.
Y'know what else I like? Kool-Aid. Because even hyperexaggerated interpretations of fruit deserve their own flavor palette. That, and I have no shame.
There was a point in my life when these two snack joys maintained independent existences. It was a simpler time. But then someone pointed me to Alton Brown's recipe for Koolickles and my world was upended. Apparently, these are standard fare in the Mississippi Delta, and the trend picked up steam when the New York Times ran a piece on them last year. So now I must ask: Who here has tried these? What are they like? Are they the solution to all of my Kool-Aid-pickle-pairing problems? Or are they hell in the form of an cylinder? I demand answers.
A jar of honey can become a sticky mess. Next time you're adding honey to another dish or a mug of tea, use a honey dipper to prevent a thick gooey layer from spreading.
Chocolate-stuffed bananas on the grill
Tyler Florence welcomes new daughter
Beware kids' menus!
