Top Chef Masters Recap - Tongue, Firmly in Cheek

Rick Bayless on Top Chef Masters. Photo: BravoTV.com

What fresh hell is this?

We could tell "Top Chef Masters" producers were hoping to get an "eww, gross" rise out of audiences with their elimination challenge last night: Cooking with organ meat. (They even dedicated a text message poll to the matter: "Which offal is the most awful? Ears, heart, stomach or tongue?") But to more adventurous viewers -- and to the four masters who regarded their ordained ingredients with either laid-back geekiness or "bring it on" vigor -- the far grislier prospect was the choice of guest judges: amusement-park patrons.

To be fair, the hungry throngs waiting to sample the results of the "street food" challenge seemed mostly to be savvy foodie-hipsters and not some stereotypical coaster-riding troglodytes to whom a mall pretzel with mustard is a culinary leap of faith. But that didn't stop LudoBites bad boy Ludo Lefebvre from burying his tenderly simmered pig's ear pieces under mounds of gloppy cheese in an attempt to fool the masses; similarly, Pikayo's Wilo Benet sliced the beef heart in his colorful pita pockets so thin as to be unrecognizable.

Of course, any competition in which Mexican cuisine whiz Rick Bayless is given tongue while others make do with tripe is somewhat stacked from the beginning. (That's a little like daring Julia Child to whip up something prominently featuring butter.) But if the edibles on display paled in comparison to previous weeks' offerings -- something duly reflected in the panel's scores -- at least there were some good old-fashioned personality clashes to be had.

Who you were rooting against said a lot about you: Was it the sleeve-tattooed Lefebvre, whose arrogant Frenchman shtick was so pronounced that even he acknowledged it was a shtick? (Sample quote: "I don't share, I'm French!") Or was it Bayless, whose Midwestern passive-aggression lurked just beneath his golly-gee exterior? That Lefebvre tried to beat Bayless at his own game -- tortillas and meat -- only made the face-off that much more delicious.

"What does a Frenchman know about quesadillas?" Bayless griped. Sure, the adept Chicagoan ultimately cinched an easy victory with his tangy, tender tongue-chorizo-bacon tacos. But when he let loose with the lamentable pun, "once Rick Bayless has slipped you tongue, you'll never forget it," we at least knew who we didn't want to win.