
No apples were harmed in the baking of this pie.
Perhaps at some point in the distant past, it was possible for a person under the age of 50 to whip up a mock apple pie, hold the irony. Now in an age wherein slowstainable locaheirganic produce is de rigueur in many circles (not mine, but then again, I pour cherry soda all over unsuspecting hams and eat brains from a can) it seems almost viciously retrograde to dump lemony simple syrup on top of a pile of mushed-up crackers and pass it off as fruit.
So don't do that. Just enjoy it for its bizarrely satisfying damp cracker heft. Use, I dunno, heirloom leaf lard in the crust or send a tithe to Michael Pollan if you feel you need to, but really, this pie is in no need of apology.
Get the Ritz Mock Apple Pie recipe after the jump.
The recipe has been a de facto part of the red cracker box since shortly after it hit the market 75 years ago. It's a successor of the hardtack and soda cracker pies popularized in times when fresh fruit was scarce, expensive and not as easily refrigerated. Though anecdotal evidence suggests that some people have mistaken this for actual apple-laden apple pie -- it's popular April Fool's Day fare -- my rendition, at least, was a dead ringer for my Grandma Kinsman's go-to lemon pie. That, too, was lifted from the side of a dry goods box (Argo cornstarch, to be exact), so hey -- raise a fork to the undersung hired gun product recipe writers of days gone by and dig on in.
Ritz Mock Apple Pie
Pastry for 2-crust 9-inch pie*
36 RITZ Crackers, coarsely broken (about 1 3/4 cups crumbs)
2 cups sugar
2 teaspoons cream of tartar
Grated peel of 1 lemon
2 tablespoons lemon juice
2 tablespoons butter or margarine
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
Preheat oven to 425 degrees F. Roll out half of the pastry and place in 9-inch pie plate. Place cracker crumbs in crust; set aside.
Mix sugar and cream of tartar in medium saucepan. Gradually stir in 1 3/4 cups water until well blended. Bring to boil on high heat. Reduce heat to low; simmer 15 minutes. Add lemon peel and juice; cool. Pour syrup over cracker crumbs. Dot with butter; sprinkle with cinnamon. Roll out remaining pastry; place over pie. Trim; seal and flute edges. Slit top crust to allow steam to escape.
Bake 30 to 35 minutes or until crust is crisp and golden. Cool completely.
Recipe via Kraftfoods.com
*The one pictured above is a hand-rolled lard/butter crust, but there's no need to get schmancy about it. I just had really bad insomnia.
Kat Kinsman is the Senior Editor of AOL Food

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5-08-2009 @10:39PM Sarah said... I am SO tempted to make one of these, but really, nobody can beat my mom's real apple pie so they would know the diff for sure. Maybe if I found people that never had it before...
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5-08-2009 @10:01PM Monty Harris said... I made it out of curiosity during the past year. All I can say is it fooled those whom consumed it. I was quite thrilled by the reactions. Oh, I just turned 50.
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5-08-2009 @10:39PM Kat Kinsman said... Monty - I'm very curious. Is that the exact recipe you used? I think I may have used an exceptionally large lemon.
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5-09-2009 @5:12PM Monty Harris said... Hi Kat.
I'm sure I used this one but I do remember using more Ritz because the 36 crackers didn't seem to be enough to make a tall enough pie. I would have used all the juice in the lemon I zested. I'm sure and I would have not measured it. I don't recall any other modifications. The cream of tarter will add more acid if your lemon comment is eluding to pucker factor. ;o)
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5-10-2009 @4:21PM ric said...
fabulous!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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5-10-2009 @7:01PM Gobo said... I made this for a party recently and told people it was apple pie to see their reaction. Everyone enjoyed it but only a few people were actually fooled. The most spot-on comment I got was, "This tastes like the filling in a McDonalds apple pie."
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5-12-2009 @11:02AM Barb said... I've used a similar recipe for years that my mom had. She died in 1962 and I am now 69, so you it has been around a long time. Try it without breaking the crackers, or if you are reluctant to do that, break them in half only. Use some brown sugar instead of some of the white. I do 50-50. I don't use lemon rind, but I do use a pinch of nutmeg along with the cinnamon. It has been a crowd pleaser and fooler for as long as I can remember.
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11-13-2009 @11:13PM GJ said... The thing about this pie is that for poor or pioneer families Chrackers were always cheep and avalible. Lemons and oranges could be shipped farther and would last longer than apples unless you had your own trees. Even when my dad was growing up in the 20's and 30's an orange they didn't need to share was a big deal at Christmas.
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1-06-2011 @8:09PM The Apple Pie Connoisseur said... I've made similar apple pies in the past, but not with these exact proportions. I look forward to giving it a try.
Thanks for sharing!
John McConnell
The Apple Pie Connoisseur
http://www.applepie.org/
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4-22-2011 @5:08PM Cindy said... What a nice blast from the pasta. I remember making this pie in a smaller version for my easy bake oven when I was in third grade. I'm now 47.
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8-01-2011 @8:35AM Leticia Avierkiieva said... Dear Sir or Madam,
My name is Leticia Avierkiieva and I am a contributor at www.mycitycuisine.org, a wiki project. I am currently working on an article about Mock Apple Pie for the project, and am in need of a photo for the article.
I wanted to inquire in regards to your photo:
http://www.slashfood.com/2009/05/08/ritz-mock-apple-pie/
The photo would be perfect for the article. Would you be willing to give mycitycuisine.org permission to use your photo for the project?
If you agree to let mycitycuisine.org to use the photo, please specify the terms of permission in your reply so I can upload this photo with the correct license terms.
1.) I certify that I am the owner of the photo(s). I grant the publisher of mycitycuisine.org the right to use the photo(s) on mycitycuisine.org and in its companion mobile software with attribution to me as the photo owner.
OR
2.) I certify that I am the owner of this photo. I release all rights of this photo and place this photo in the public domain.
I thank you in advance and look forward to hearing from you.
Best regards,
Leticia Avierkiieva (please reply to gourmand86@yahoo.com with this request)
PS: mycitycuisine.org is a wiki project so you are encouraged to contribute to it by sharing your knowledge of your local cuisine. Thank you.
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