Our wonderful (and similarly food-frenzied) friends at Chow asked a question today that may have some folks bristling: Is it ever OK to ogle a stranger's meal at a restaurant and ask what she's eating?
Etiquette writer Helena Echlin posits that "though it's OK to look, staring at people while they're eating makes them uncomfortable. If you need help identifying a dish, ask the server (avoid pointing if you can). Don't ask the person eating it." She notes an exception in the case of ridiculously close tables -- common in places like New York City and San Francisco -- in which case it would be absurdly formal to summon a waiter. Echlin interviews a restaurant expert who declares he "would never cross the imaginary wall" between tables.
In a crowded eatery with tiny two-tops, it's true that an "imaginary wall" can feel especially important. When a noisy couple are inches away, your demure chatter about the weather quickly turns into an extended dance remix with their loud argument about his mother-in-law.
[Via Chow]
Read more and take the poll after the jump.
But we have to wonder if this is common only in larger cities: in Portland, Ore., we recall hilarious conversations with strangers about who ordered what and whether it was good that turned into foodie bonding moments. But we were grateful when the other party knew when to smile and turn back to their own conversation. As Echlin says, "If [a fellow diner] ... offers you a considered evaluation, that's great. If he just says, 'I'm having the pig trotters,' don't demand a full review. Just say thank you and turn back to your companion."
Is it ever OK to ask about other people's meal? Do you believe in the "invisible wall"? What are your rules?
What Can I Get You Folks? - Eating Out for Thanksgiving
In Defense of Guy Fieri
'Top Chef Vegas' - And Then There Were Five
