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Culinary Degradation - Twinkie Dogs, Guinness Floats, and Other REALLY Bad Ideas

Okay, I've tried my fair share of weird food combinations. I've munched down on Twinkie dogs and slurped a couple of Guinness floats. Once, in a misguided attempt to revolutionize roast chicken, I stuffed a pullet with banana bread and glazed it with a cranberry and lime juice reduction. For that matter, I even tried Voodoo Donuts' maple bacon long john, a taste sensation that was salty, crunchy, sweet, and altogether delicious.

Recently, I came across an oldie-but baddie: Auntie Bessie's "mash and sausage cone," a snack that consists of mashed potatoes, peas, sausage, and gravy, all packed into an ice cream cone. While some people, apparently, have known about this crime against humanity for a while, it was news to me. Metro, a British blog, may have hit the nail on the head with their caption "horrible, horrible, horrible, horrible, horrible." I might add in "Dear God, oh God, why?!?"

To be fair, though, Aunt Bessie has, apparently, abandoned the mash cone concept, noting that the cones got too soggy. With this in mind, I decided to seek out the next generation of horrifying food concepts.

I think I might have found it.




The Surf, an eatery in Atlantic City, recently unveiled three new cholesterol-busting sandwiches that push the edge of cuisine (and the definition of food) to the breaking point. The first concoction, the Surf Burger, uses two funnel cakes to bookend a pair of quarter-pound burgers, three pieces of cheese, four slices of bacon, lettuce, and tomatoes. The second sandwich, the Triple Play, wraps two of the summer's most iconic flavors, a quarter-pound cheeseburger and a butterflied hot dog, in a huge slice of cheese pizza. Finally, the Surf also offers their own take on the Twinkie dog: a hot dog wrapped in bacon, placed in a sliced-open Twinkie, and grilled.

I don't exactly know where to go with this. Part of me wants to run in horror, while the other part wants to take a trip down to Atlantic City, if only to support the Surf's imaginative efforts. Most of all, I want to see what other horrifying junk food ideas are lurking on the edge of the culinary wasteland. With that in mind, I'm sending out a call to all Slashfood readers: tell me about the worst, most repulsive junk food dish that you've ever consumed, produced, or heard about. If I can track it down (and if we haven't already covered it), I will gladly write about it!

Filed Under: Food News, Ingredients, Fast Food
Tags: Auntie Bessies, AuntieBessies, british isles, comfort food, Guinness float, GuinnessFloat, Metro, Surf Burger, SurfBurger, The surf, TheSurf, Triple Play, TriplePlay, Twinkie Dog, TwinkieDog, Voodoo Donuts, VoodooDonuts

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Reader comments (Page 1 of 1)

Angela

1-14-2009 @3:24PM Angela said... The Hot Fudge Subdae Burger was a quater pound patty of freshlty ground hamburger cooked to order and then topped with asingle scoop of vanilla ice cream, a generous drizzle of hot fudge sauce, nuts, whipped cream, cherry and, I think the top of the bun.

This was at an irish pub on the corner of N. San Francisco St and Rt. 66 in Flagstaff, Arizona. The pub had this hideous arrangement called the Pepto Prioze: a gallon of Pepto, a free t-shirt and a monetary refund of the purchase price of three of ther burgers/rrimmings in the contrest, except for the autmomatic nominations. The 'automatic nominations,' of which the Hot Fudge Sundat Burger was one, only required one to eat ONE burger.
Reply

museum mouse

1-14-2009 @2:38PM museum mouse said... Rumour has it that in Scotland they will deep fry anything junk food in batter. Deep fried, battered pizza anyone? Or a Stonner: a deep fried sausage wrapped in donner meat then battered and deep fried. Yuk!
Reply

Astin

1-14-2009 @3:49PM Astin said... Dangerous Dan's in Toronto. Nothing too strange, but the size makes up for it.

The Quadruple C (Collosal Colon Clogger Combo):
24oz burger served with a quarter pound of cheese, a quarter pound of bacon, and 2 fried eggs. Also comes with a large shake (flavor of your choice) and a small poutine.

Follow that up with a dessert of The Beast!

1 Deep Fried Mars Bar
6 Deep Fried Cheesecake Triangles
6 Deep Fried Brownie Squares
2 Scoops of Vanilla Whip Cream
2 Scoops of Chocolate Syrup
2 Scoops of Chocolate Chips

Reply

Derrick

1-14-2009 @8:03PM Derrick said... Dude, The Vortex in Atlanta has a burger called the Double Bypass:

3 slices of cheese, 5 slices of bacon, a fried egg, 1/2 pound burger, served on a 2 grilled cheese sandwiches instead of a bun.
Reply

Dan Tannenbaum

1-15-2009 @9:35AM Dan Tannenbaum said... As for Guinness concoctions, try mixing four ounces of orange juice with twelve ounces of ice-cold Guinness... Delicious!
Reply

Brian

1-15-2009 @1:23PM Brian said... This post is making my diabetes hurt.
Reply

SaraFist

1-15-2009 @5:59PM SaraFist said... Better than a Guinness float is a Rogue Chocolate Stout float, or Hazelnut Brown float. Holy hells.
Reply

John

1-17-2009 @11:20AM John said... I saw "UHF" in the theaters opening weekend. (Yes I am one of them) Ever since I have enjoyed a Twinkie wiener sandwich on my birthday. They are awesome! I am pretty sure, however, if you eat more than one a year you will vibrate out of existence.
Reply

8 Comments / 1 Pages

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