Debunking Beer Can Chicken: A Waste Of Good Beer, And Dangerous
Famous Death Row Last Meals
I know people swallow it (note that I will not reveal my own preference - this is not one of those sites), however the concept of cooking it up into a gourmet meal is totally new to me. I'm speaking, of course, of semen and the new book, "Natural Harvest: A collection of semen-based recipes" by Paul Photenhauer.
In the book, Paul tell us that, "Semen is not only nutritious, but has a palatable texture and wonderful cooking properties." It's a widely available ingredient and the flavor is complex like a fine wine. Depending on the male's diet, the flavor will vary.
The book contains recipes for the almost white Russian, man made oysters, tuna sashimi with dipping sauce (you know what that is), and (if I may insert editorial opinion here), the grossest of them all, creamy cum crepes.
Paul does give the all-important warning, "Please do not add semen to your guest's food without informing them beforehand," and I thank him for that. While I'm typically OK risking it with a mystery meat on my plate and have even gone so far as to eat fried bugs, I would definitely need a warning and perhaps a doctor's seal of approval on the producing male before digging in to any dish from Natural Harvest.
Are you totally disgusted or would you try it?
Natural Harvest is available for $24.99 at Lulu.com. You can also find pictures there of some of the other recipes.
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11-29-2008 @2:31PM rainey said... I really wish you hadn't gone there but then I opened up another favorite site (BoingBoing.net) and they had this http://beta.yudu.com/item/details/13884/Sample-Version---The-Testicle-Cookbook !
It's beyond gross but it must be in the air today. =o
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11-29-2008 @4:53PM Satchel said... Oh fercrissakes. This *must* be a joke. Tell me it's a joke? >gag
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11-29-2008 @6:18PM Cathi said... I'll be thinking twice before I come back here looking for something about food :-(
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11-29-2008 @7:18PM Maman said... Please remind me to never accept an invitation to a dinner party at Mr. Photenhauer's house!
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11-29-2008 @7:19PM Mish said... Come on guys, if you eat meat you can have semen...I'm serious.
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11-29-2008 @9:14PM Satchel said... Mish, the question isn't whether I can -- it's why would I want to?
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11-30-2008 @10:20AM meg said... i am very disappointed that ms. pollack found it necessary to post about this topic; it seems so out of the slashfood vein. i will be very skeptical about the validity of the articles from here on out.
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11-30-2008 @7:25AM Gobo said... It might be for sale, but I'm not convinced that it's anything but a big prank.... a joke cookbook.
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11-30-2008 @10:12AM Rob O. said... According to Cecil Adams, semen is nutritionally equivalent to raw egg whites but still, it's hardly appetizing. I'm not sure this topic is entirely in, um, good taste either...
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11-30-2008 @10:55AM peggy said... i think this is the last time i visit your site. sorry, but although it is a "cookbook" of sorts. WAY INAPROPRIATE!!!!!!!!!! OMG!
not what i want to read at 7am on a sunday....just because it says cookbook, does not make it ok.
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11-30-2008 @11:51AM STH said... Oh, for god's sake, relax. The link to the cookbook has been making the rounds (my boyfriend found it on Metafilter and e-mailed it to me a few days ago) and it's food-related, so it's entirely appropriate and natural to discuss it here. If the post grosses you out, don't read it!
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11-30-2008 @3:13PM juztick said... ...and then tomorrow we can have booger bread rolls.
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11-30-2008 @3:37PM Satchel said... You know, STH, I've read arguments like yours on any number of special-interest websites, and it's never convinced me. There are plenty of places on the web for fans of gross-out humor, and it does no one any harm if such things stay in those places where folks will appreciate them. Meanwhile, I'd be grateful not to get ambushed.
And the "cookbook" has about as much relevance to food as "chicken crossing the road" jokes, though it's not nearly as funny.
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11-30-2008 @3:53PM Tiffany said... I can't believe so many of you are in a tizzy about this. It's a relevant food topic and she's not a huge advocate of it if you couldn't tell. To say you'll be re-thinking the validity of articles here on out is clearly taking it too far.
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11-30-2008 @4:33PM Gobo said... With all due respect, that's crap, Satchel. Nobody's being "ambushed" by an article on a blog. There's not even anything adult-oriented about it, unless you're offended by the word 'semen'.
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11-30-2008 @8:45PM Satchel said... Depends on your definition of "ambush," I guess. When a blog I've read and enjoyed for years throws me a curve ball like this -- a vulgar joke disguised as a serious food posting -- well, it feels like an ambush to me.
If you are trying to please both the weak- and the strong-stomached, which way should you lean?
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11-30-2008 @9:56PM G said... Eggs come out of a chicken's bottom. Milk comes out a cow/goat/horse/whatever's boobs. I think most should be able to handle a bit of cum.
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11-30-2008 @10:52PM Satchel said... The difference being, of course, that eggs and milk are food.
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12-01-2008 @8:10AM Rio Yeti said... This doesn't look like an ambush to me. There is no vulgarity, no "shocking images", it's simply an article about this cookbook which may or may not be a joke, and from what I can tell the writer of the blog is presenting it with scepticism.
It is not "gross out humor" and therefore would have nothing to do in one of those sites (or at least it didn't make me laugh...).
Eggs and milk are food. Shirako is also food, eaten in japan... being "fish semen". Oh and when we're babies we drink breast milk, from humans... and "breast milk cheese" is not a myth, people actually eat that.
This being said, will I buy this cookbook and try any recipe...? No way in hell !
Is this article shocking, ambushing, gross out humor, etc ? Nope, it's food related, slashfood is about food news, not only nice recipes and nice food pictures (and it would be pretty bland if it was).
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12-01-2008 @1:23PM Trivers said... This is, pardon the pun, in very poor taste. I'll be removing slashfood from my bookmarks.
Real cookbook or not, this is not what I want to see in a food blog.
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