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Until earlier today, I had no idea that the first Thursday in November held any particular significance (especially in light of the importance of the first Tuesday). However, during my regular trip through the blogosphere today, I discovered that there is a group out there that has declared the first Thursday in November to be National Men Make Dinner Day.
It's a 'holiday' designed specifically for those men who rarely get near the stove and know the refrigerator mostly as a place where the cold beer and soda is kept. The website that is devoted to this day offers a set of qualifications and perky guidelines in order to suss out whether 1). you're the type of man who should be participating and 2). whether you're really prepared to take on the evening meal.
I find this arbitrary national holiday more than a little offensive. It assumes that there are hordes of men out there who do absolutely no cooking and that after a year of not cooking, they can redeem theyselves with a single night in the kitchen. Additionally, if you want your partner to feel at home in the kitchen do their share, throwing them in there without instruction or assistance is asking for unhappiness and frustration. Lastly, I'm really irked at how sexist and limited the view of this holiday is. What about same sex couples, people who live in shared housing situations and those homes where it happens to be the man who does all the cooking.
Instead of this poorly constructed and limiting holiday, I'd like to offer an alternate suggestion. What about simply choosing a day (and I think this should be monthly, not just yearly) where families get together and consciously prepare dinner together. Parents, grandparents, kids, partners, roommates and friends. Teach one another that getting dinner on the table doesn't have to drudgery and that everyone can participate. If we were all to cook like that, we could put this insipid little holiday right out of existance.
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11-06-2008 @5:17PM p said... Now that we're gonna have an African American president, maybe the whole black/white thing can be put to rest. So now people have to start the man/woman thing all over again? Geez get over it!
My wife and I (she a female, me a male) have swapped weeks for years. One cooks, shops, pretty much all things kitchen related from Sun thru Sat. The other gets the week off (except for housework that week). This way we each get a chance to cook, try new things, have a week to research and put a menu together - and a rest from the kitchen every other week is nice too.
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11-06-2008 @6:17PM Sarah said... In our house it is MY kitchen! Mine! Mine! ;-)
My husband is known to claim that I don't even let him in to cook.
I am not one to care if we divvy up kitchen duties. I do the cooking, the cleaning, the shopping - and like the retro house-wifey I am....I am happy with it.
Though he does make better pancakes than me. Just don't tell him that!
http://gazingin.wordpress.com/
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11-07-2008 @7:22AM Daniel said... It's probably not typical, but I cook just about every night in our house (and I'm a dude). And I love it. My wife doesn't mind either. Sometimes she feels like she's not doing her part, but it's more about who can do, not who should do. She works later hours than me so I am more than happy to have dinner just about ready when she gets home.
We cook together all the time. We both work, so we both cook. It's neither of our responsibilities, it's both of ours. It's great. I love cooking and don't understand when a guy laughs about not being able to cook.
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11-06-2008 @9:05PM RJ said... Well...I am very lucky, indeed...my husband does 99% of the cooking. I did do the cooking tonight, though (made pizza...he is an awesome cook, but poor guy can't bake)...so looks like we swapped tonight, only in reverse. :-) :-)
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11-07-2008 @7:14AM CJ said... I do the weekly cooking and meal planning at our house. It's just two of us now so I cook a few meals at once on my day off. I work in a clinical laboratory full time so multitasking in the kitchen comes naturally. My husband has been cooking every Saturday for over 20 years even when our son was still living at home. He's not quite as talented at budgeting and planning for weeks worth of meals. If work a Sunday or Holiday, he cooks then also. I taught my son to cook and sure wish some girl out there would see what a wonderful catch he is because of that. Our life has come full circle, sometimes we come home to our son having left something simmering in the crock pot for us. during the last 8 years my husband has taken up doing all the laundry. We have a cleaning lady so I have plenty of time to do the everyday cooking, which I love to do.
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11-07-2008 @7:43AM Dana said... My husband and I have our own way of divvying up the cooking... In the summer, he BBQs and does the majority of the cooking and planning because he really enjoys his BBQ. The rest of the year, I cook inside and do the majority of the cooking and planning because I enjoy the challenge of trying to cook with mainly local ingredients in Ontario in the winter (it really gets the brain in gear during the long winter months *grin*).
We're not totally strict on this. I will cook inside in the summer, and he will BBQ outside in the winter (as long as he can find the BBQ in the snow, he's willing to use it). But it means we know who will be cooking when for the most part, and we can both do the type of cooking we most enjoy.
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11-07-2008 @9:49AM Jessica said... I'm with Sarah... the kitchen is MY place :)
I genuinely enjoy grocery shopping, meal planning, and cooking. I like being the caretaker in that respect.
We divide the work this way: I cook, he cleans.
http://shushka.wordpress.com/
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11-07-2008 @10:31AM Patrick R said... "I find this arbitrary national holiday more than a little offensive."
Thank you! Indeed, every day is "men make dinner day" in our house.
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11-07-2008 @11:00AM Aaron said... hah--I'm a guy, and I do all the cooking and about 95% of the meal planning in our household. Aside from the tea cabinet, the kitchen and all its tools are completely mine.
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11-07-2008 @12:59PM Samme said... In our house I tend to sleep in, and my better half is an early riser. He makes breakfast, and sometimes lunch on days we are home. I am nearly always the one to make dinner. We are both pretty good at cooking and usually get the groceries together.
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