When I was a kid, a Hungarian restaurant opened in my neighborhood. As this was the seventies, and my family lived in the culinary wasteland of Northern Virginia, every new eatery was an occasion for celebration. Consequently, the mood was high as my parents took my sisters and I to consume levesek, paprikas, and other delicacies. Unfortunately, my father felt obliged to give me a bite of his appetizer, which involved smooth meaty sausage-ish things. They tasted yummy, but when my father told me where they came from, my appetite evaporated.In the years since, I've often regretted that I didn't take more time to savor the testicle dish that my father saw fit to share with me. The Hungarian joint only stayed open for a few months, and "prairie oysters" are not particularly common in American restaurants. To my knowledge, I haven't eaten any testicles since that evening, although I've long since developed both the taste and the bal...um...the intestinal fortitude necessary to try the dish.
With this in mind, I was particularly interested in the World Testicle Cooking Championship, a yearly event that is held in Belgrade, Serbia. Boasting chefs from around the world, the Championship highlights the latest discoveries and advances in testicle cooking. Recently, in fact, Australia caused quite a bit of a stir when it bragged about the culinary charms of kangaroo testicles yet failed to field a cooking team. Apparently, testicle cookery is not for the faint of heart!
Barring a sudden influx of money, I probably won't be going to the Championship any time soon, but Ljubomir Erovic, a renowned testicle chef, has recently released Cooking with Balls, an e-cookbook devoted to testicle cooking. Featuring recipes for testicle pizza, testicles [sic] pie, and barbecued testicles, the book also has some pretty hair-raising illustrations. Seriously, one video that demonstrated how to "peel" testicles made me a little light headed. That having been said, maybe I should leave the preparation to a professional. Now, if I can only find a good testicle joint...

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10-02-2008 @8:56PM arasmus2 said... I know there are at least two towns, Byron and Huntley, in northern Illinois that have annual Turkey Testicle Festivals. You could always try those.
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10-02-2008 @5:59PM Monika said... This would be the perfect for a joint promotion with those bull testicle bags/purses.
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10-02-2008 @9:15PM rckymtnski said... Here in Colorado we call them "Rocky Mountain Oysters" and you can find them in quite a few places, even the Rockies games I think! I have tried them at a place called "Bruce's" in Severance CO (not in business anymore) and they weren't that bad....but I don't see myself seeking them out, either.
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10-02-2008 @9:36PM Secret Asian Man said... I prefer steamed ovaries served on a bed of fallopian tube pasta.
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10-03-2008 @10:00AM diasha said... Plenty of Georgian/Russian restaurants in Brooklyn, NY serve these. I tried them once and they were OK, not sure if I want more...
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10-03-2008 @10:01AM Bruce Watson said... Diasha-
Thanks for the tip. I actually get down to Brighton every now and again!
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10-04-2008 @8:23PM Brad said... Scandal!!! Britney Spears's NEW sex tape!
Here:
http://scelebvideo.com/video.php?link=Britney-Spears-new-sex-tape
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10-08-2008 @4:56PM TC said... Thank you for putting the nonce word "testiclade" in my head.
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10-08-2008 @4:57PM Bruce Watson said... TC-
I think you've just come up with the least appetizing drink ever imagined. Well done!
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