It's a good weekend for attending a food festival if you:

a) are a hipster of the American Northwest
b) love wine
c) have never attended a crawfish boil
d) are hungry

If you, like me, find yourself nodding emphatically at these criteria, read on! This weekend offers food festivals sprinkled across the country, promising some of the most interesting and delicious foods I've seen in a while.Portland Indie Wine Festival (May 2-4, 2008) -- Like an indie film festival, except for wine. Sample wines from small, independent wine makers from across the Northwest, and attend seminars like "Natural Winemaking in the Age of Technology" and "Can You Taste Place in Chocolate, Coffee, and Wine?" The festival will additionally feature about 20 local restaurants, and likely a solid number of hipster wine lovers from across the state. Too excited to wait until the weekend? Check out the event's blog to hold you over.

Southern Breeze Wine and Culinary Festival (May 2-4, 2008) -- This traveling food festival makes a stop in Orange Beach, Alabama this weekend for some serious wining and dining. Attend the walkabout brunch to sample dishes from local restaurants, or sit down for a full-on wine dinner. On Saturday, watch chefs compete for the title of Orange Beach's top chef, with celebrity judges TBA. No worries if you can't make it this time, the festival has one last stop in Santa Rosa Beach, Florida.

WhistleStop Festival and Rocket City BBQ (May 2-4, 2008) -- While you're in Alabama, head to historic Huntsville for some real southern cooking. There will be a BBQ contest for both amateurs and professionals, plus music and entertainment. But the best part about this festival? They have a jingle! You can listen to it here! Amazing: "You can even bring your granny 'cause she loves that BBQ." Also: "Ayeee! This pig is smokin'!"

Long Grove Chocolate Festival (May 2-4, 2008) -- Taste chocolate everything at this annual festival in Illinois. That includes chocolate-dipped fruit, chocolate-covered popcorn, chocolate cake, chocolate donuts, chocolate martinis and, of course, chocolate! I can't begin to imagine how delicious the town must smell.

Pittsburgh Wine Festival (May 3-8, 2008) -- Whether you are an oenophile or an oeno-it-all (their joke, not mine), meet up with similar folk at this Pennsylvania wine festival. All proceeds from the festival benefit the University of Pittsburgh Cancer Institute, so there's an extra incentive to drink up. The festival's main event -- the VIP and Grand Tasting -- won't occur until later next week, but you can gear up in the meantime with events like wine seminars and dinners at local restaurants.

Pensacola Crawfish Festival (May 2-4, 2008) -- One great thing about food festivals is that there is one for every type of foodie out there. Like maybe you don't enjoy chocolate or wine, but crawfish is really your thing. Perfect! The festival "celebrates the Cajun influence in the Northwest Florida community" AND it's "one of the largest crawfish boils in the state." Only one of the largest? Who's topping this? Anyway, the festival looks like the place for one-of-a-kind events like a crawfish-eating contest or a "nascraw" race. Oh yeah -- and delicious Cajun food.