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Gust blogging at Ruhlman this week, Anthony Bourdain took the opportunity to take on the Food Network. Aside from a handful of comments here and there in the past, this is the first time that the popular bad-boy chef has taken on the network as a whole, giving readers his opinions on the network's popular celebrity chefs and the network as a whole. As you might imagine, it's not all positive as her describes the network as "[crumbling] like undercooked Bundt cake into a goo of Cheez Wiz." Check out the full post for more details, but here's a brief overview:
- Alton - Smart and chock full of good commentary. How did this guy "slip inside the wire--and stay there all these years?"
- Emeril - Nice guy, good cook and pretty much like Escoffier compared to some of the "bobbleheads" on the network now, though AB is not a fan of the show.
- Bobby Flay - "Throwdown" is cruel and a successful guy like Bobby doesn't need that kind of treatment from the network.
- Mario Batali - Completely wasted since Molto Mario was shot down.
- Giada - Totally robbed in her Iron Chef America battle with Rachael Ray. "Send her to Italy and let her cook. She's good at it."
- Rachael - "She's selling us satisfaction, the smug reassurance that mediocrity is quite enough." Depressing.
Find out what he thinks of Sandra Lee after the jump:
- Sandra Lee - "Pure evil. This frightening Hell Spawn of Kathie Lee and Betty Crocker seems on a mission to kill her fans, one meal at a time. She Must Be Stopped. Her death-dealing can-opening ways will cut a swath of destruction through the world if not contained. I would likely be arrested if I suggested on television that any children watching should promptly go to a wooded area with a gun and harm themselves. What's the difference between that and Sandra suggesting we fill our mouths with Ritz Crackers, jam a can of Cheez Wiz in after and press hard? None that I can see. This is simply irresponsible programming. Its only possible use might be as a psychological warfare strategy against the resurgent Taliban--or dangerous insurgent groups. A large-racked blonde repeatedly urging Afghans and angry Iraqis to stuff themseles with fatty, processed American foods might be just the weapon we need to win the war on terror."
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2-10-2007 @3:45PM Aleks said... I have been waiting for someone to say a lot of those things. People are looking to the Food Network as the pulse of American food trends and I think it's sad. They could do such a better job! Pathetic. More pathetic that this is so rarely discussed.
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2-10-2007 @9:44PM Seth Wilson said... I completely agree with him, except that I find Emeril incredibly annoying and Bobby Flay is just a jerk.
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2-10-2007 @5:11PM Mike said... I always figure if I violently disagree with Anthony at least he'll be eloquent, but if I have ever disagreed with him it was so minor I'd long forgotten about it.
I didn't know "Molto Mario" was no longer on. I didn't discover the show at first, so my TiVo just picks up episodes and I don't pay attention to the dates. That's disappointing since it's a close second to "Good Eats" for archived episodes.
He's right about RR as well. She's cute and annoying, but there's no stopping her. I'm sure her cooking is popular since she sets the bar so low that more people now think of themselves as great cooks, rather than aspiring to be better.
I never watched the Giada RR "Iron Chef" match, but mainly since it wasn't "real". They had each of them backed up by a real Iron Chef so you couldn't really give either credit or blame. No way FoodTV is going to toss one of their smiling stars into the deep end of the pool while we watch.
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2-10-2007 @7:44PM GhaleonQ said... "Molto Mario" will still be broadcast. They fired him from that series, so there will be no new episodes of it.
And while Bourdain is on point for most of it, his insults of local, undereducated food producers seem unnecessary and false. Aschatz can turn out a better meal than some random lady from Kentucky, but if he were forced to pit a traditional French toast and eggs dish with hers, I don't think that his victory would be a sure thing.
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2-10-2007 @11:08PM Foodie Bride said... His Sandra Lee rant is classic.
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2-10-2007 @11:37PM Robyn said... I like Anthony Bourdain. I find him fascinating and oddly hot but what a snob. Ugh. I will try to hold my appreciation for both him and Rachael in my head at the same time.
Not all of us need to be chefs. Jeez.
Oh, and I can't believe he said good things about Emeril. I heard he had to take cooking classes before getting his own show.
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2-10-2007 @11:42PM Just Matt said... We've been watching less of FTV over the past few years. There's no single reason, but I guess I feel like the channel is shooting for the lowest common denominator, and constantly finding it.
They have great shows but they keep the good ones locked away and show crap all day long.
From 6pm to 4am tonight (Saturday, all times EST) they have scheduled the same 4 shows over and over and over. One V-day special with Emeril, one Iron Chef, and 2 Challenge episodes. I do understand that Challenge is dead cheap to produce, but it is also brain dead programming with false 'danger' created to add tension. I also understand why you would want to program for multiple time zones. Why not throw the viewers a bone and show an episode of The Hardy Boys since the damn thing is only shown once a week? While I'm on the subject of brain dead what's with all of the travel shows? Don't get me wrong, we've visited a few of the locations from $40 and Food Detective (IIRC D.C., Boston, Chicago, San Fran.) and had some good food. Although we have enjoyed the occasional gem there are more than a few clunkers. A lot of the locations are so far off the beaten track, or seem like a favor to a failing business, that there's no way we would consider visiting. Shouldn't a channel about food spend more time cooking food and less time showing? What about more shows that teach the right way to buy food, especially stuff like buying fish in the midwest, or beef on either coast? One of our favorite shows is Take Home Chef, probably because he does both of those things very well. I have no idea why he isn't on Food - although if they fired Mario then I guess I don't know what it takes.
Gordon Ramsay, Alton, Jamie Oliver are all very different, but both seem to actually care about helping people find and prepare good food. I just don't get that vibe from the overwhelming majority of people on Food.
More real chefs, less travel*, more basics, fewer gimicky chefs.
* I like to watch Anthony B. as well, but his show is less about the location and more about the food, so I don't include him in my general dislike of the travel shows.
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2-11-2007 @12:30AM MikeB said... Hear, hear!
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2-11-2007 @3:40PM Megan said... Love his comments on Paula Deen: "A recent Hawaii show was indistinguishable from an early John Waters film. And the food on a par with the last scene of Pink Flamingos."
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2-11-2007 @12:29PM Adriane said... Robyn- Is it that suprising that Emeril- or any other chef, for that matter- went to school for their profession? I think I know what you mean, but it sounds like one of those stories that got twisted by the media. "Training at school" turns into "Oh my God! He doesn't know how to cook and needs classes!"
Anyway- Love AB but woooow, did he really say all that about Lee? I guess I can understand the rant about the person...but all that Taliban mumbo jumbo? What the h*ll is he talking about?
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2-11-2007 @3:04PM Fash said... I love Tony...and like someone else here said, I also find him weirdly attractive. SEX-ay...it must be his swagger that gets me, because he eats things that make me want to die - like an eyeball from a seal that was butchered on a kitchen floor before his very eyes. (BTW, that episode of No Reservations was such a disturbing combination of bloodlust and family values that I had to watch it twice.)
Anyway, I'm glad to see he didn't have any harsh words for AB, my hero of the Food Network. I have actually had "a-ha" moments of clarity watching Good Eats and been able to modify recipes to great success after getting a little insight into the science behind combining certain ingredients.
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2-11-2007 @8:42PM itsasecret said... I totally agree with him, this is hilarious. Especially with regard
to Sandra.
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2-12-2007 @11:58AM laura said... I agree with Anthony 100% especially on the Bobby Flay Throwdown remark Its such a waste of Bobbys talent, and its just cruel that he never ever wins, even though its "blind judging" i dont buy it. The Sandra Lee remark made me almost tinkle my pants it was so great, I HATE that woman, and her show. The way she matchy matches her outfit and set decorations, they way she insists they use a soft filter focus on her, its as if we are looking at some evil nightmare dream sequence straight out of x-files. Her "semi" homemade is a joke, and her "table scapes" scream TACKY! I dont understand how a "personality" like hers is on there, along with miss "energy" herself Ina Garten who has about as much "oomph" as an enema.
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2-12-2007 @7:43PM Berkana said... I'll tell you what--Giada is a hell of a lot more pleasant to look at than Mario. If I'm going to watch cooking for entertainment and education, well, I guess Mario would be the wise old Italian food wisdom curator, and Giada would be the hot Italian chick who happens to cook.
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3-28-2007 @7:05PM Kelli Buzzard said... Molto Mario is still on FN, at 7:30 AM Pacific. The idea that Mario was shut down by FN is just another hyperbololic-to-the-point-of-misstatement--claim made by Ascerbic Anthony.
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