Photo: catatronic, Flickr
You know how Starbucks (and other coffee shops, pizza places and other food outlets) ask for your name when you order? Do you give them a real name or do you make one up?
Giving fake names seems to be a growing trend, especially at the coffee giant's many outlets. Instead of giving their real name, people are being pretty darn creative: Frankenstein, Ben Affleck, Bartholomew, even Darth Vader and Chewbacca have all been given as names from customers. Some girls go by the name "Bob" (hey!), and one man just goes by "The Man."
I usually give my real name at places like this, mainly because I don't want any screw up in my order, especially if they're busy. Though I do admit that one time at a restaurant I used the name "Larry Tate." That's Darrin's boss on Bewitched.
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1-18-2007 @4:15PM Mitzie said... I work for Starbucks, and I have encountered a few obvious fakes...for example: Ben Dover and Mary Mie. It's all in fun, you know. Some people are a bit nervous about giving their real name, and we should respect that.
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1-18-2007 @4:36PM Foodie Bride said... I've heard "K-Fed" and "Brad Pitt" while waiting on my chai latte before. I've stuck with "Cupcake" or "Grace Kelly" since the "Peyton Manning" incident. I swear, some people just have no sense of humor.
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1-18-2007 @4:43PM cybele said... I use my last name because it's easier to spell and the last thing I want is to be carrying around a cup with my name wrong. (Well, that's far from the last thing I want... but you catch my drift.)
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1-18-2007 @5:18PM Anastasia Von Beaverhausen said... If I'm in a hurry and just want to order and be done with it, I say "Mary" no matter what. I don't need my actual name yelled out in a Starbuck's, a grocery store, or a bank. I truly hate that.
If I'm feeling goofy, I say "Anastasia Von Beaverhausen" in an homage to Karen Walker or "Buffy St. Claire."
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1-18-2007 @5:28PM Venuz said... I think that in this day in age, with identity theft being the rage in crime, that people are paranoid about giving out ANY personal information. Kind of sad, but I guess that's how it is.
Sometimes I'll use an alternative name in a busy place like Starbucks (though I'm a Coffee Bean person most days :P), simply because my own first name is so common. Glad to know I'm not the only one who does this.
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1-18-2007 @5:29PM Sindy said... Ok, I admit it never occurred to me to give a fake name but I will do it NOW!Could be fun.
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1-18-2007 @5:35PM Kelly said... whatever the name tag of the person I'm ordering from is my favorite....even though I am a man with the name Kelly,its much more fun when the person waiting on me is mary lou or anne marie...thy it sometime.
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1-18-2007 @5:39PM Mary Sue said... It helps a lot if your legal, parent-given name is already a joke.
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1-18-2007 @5:46PM Not Kevin said... A friend of mine uses Kevin, so I started doing that. I hope for a day when everyone gives the name Kevin so they have to change the system...
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1-18-2007 @5:58PM Kevin said... Hey, I really am Kevin. I'll feel like a celebrity when everyone in Starbucks begins shouting, "Kevin, Kevin. Kevin. Kevin!"
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1-18-2007 @6:07PM Anastasia Von Beaverhausen said... (laughing)
Let's coordinate a date and agree across the Slashfood community, we will all say "Kevin!" (which is my beautiful boyfriend's name). What a hoot.
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1-18-2007 @6:45PM dksbook said... I always use my i-name, it causes much confusion.
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1-18-2007 @6:36PM Tamra said... I never thought about a different name. Sounds like fun. I'll have to think of something really cool and funny. Thanks for the idea!
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1-18-2007 @7:11PM lisa said... Awww dang, I thought if I clicked through I'd get some computer-generated Fratalian name.
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1-18-2007 @7:52PM R-dizzle said... I dare someone to go in and say their name is 'Coffee Bean' or 'Seattle's Best'...I'm sure that'd get you the stare down.
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1-18-2007 @8:55PM esmereldagrubb said... I did the EXACT thing Lisa!
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1-18-2007 @11:02PM Robyn said... This never occurred to me either! I don't know--I'm a bad liar. For my husband, they always fuck up his name anyway. They call him Ken and he is mellow so he just goes along with it.
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1-18-2007 @11:11PM wildeny said... If so many people hate to give their name in these public places, why did they come out with the idea of asking people's name? Why not just give the customer a number?
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1-18-2007 @11:24PM Madam said... It's this whole "let's give you excellent personal service" stuff. You can give me excellent personal service without announcing to a store what my name is.
I finally told my manager of a Safeway Grocery Store that this "personalize the experience" is nonsense. None of the checkers get my last name correct because the last few letters are cut off the receipt (a size limitation in their system), so I have to take this extra nano-second -- every damn time -- to explain it's cut off. Then, if they do happen to pronounce it correctly in spite of the missing letters, I have to hear my name said out loud in a grocery store line.
In an age of identity theft and over saturation of personal details, this bugs me.
I shop late in the evening, sometime after midnight. I live in a downtown urban environment. Sometimes the guy behind me is staggering and has a bottle of booze in his hands. Sometimes it's someone talking to God or Norman Bates' mother. I don't need my name said out loud, and then walk out into a grocery store parking lot, and hear "Kristina ... ?" And I turn around and then all of the sudden there is a knife in my gut and he makes off with my bread and milk.
I told the manager my feelings on the matter, he agreed with me 100% and apologized and said the checkers actually get demerits if they don't greet customers by name and bid farewell to customers by name. And they are audited by corporate to make sure they do so.
Now, in a grocery store and bank, I say, every time "Do not say my name out loud." They blink a few times in confusion and then say "Ok!"
In Starbucks, if you are not feeling jovial, you just say "A Customer" or "Madam."
I am particularly nice and kind to be sure the baristas and store clerks and tellers don't think me a crank pot -- but on this, I will not budge.
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4-20-2011 @6:33PM rocky said... what's wrong with you? it's just a first name. your parents didn't give you your first name to run and hide with it.