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Sarah Gim
says Pittsburgh kicks
Seattle's butt. OH YEAH? I'll take Pike Place over Polish sausage any day. Here's why:
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Costco was born right outside of Seattle. You're talking the world's largest* producer of bulk butter, deli counter muffins, five-pound logs of goat cheese, and free samples. Top that, Giant Eagle!
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Sure, a Polish sausage might beat up an oyster in a fight. But a 10-pound wild salmon would beat up both of y'all. It swims upstream, avoiding bears and dangerous man-made obstacles, just to procreate. Even the most impressive sausage... is just a bunch of ground meat wrapped in pig intestine! Eww!
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Iron City beer is better than Starbucks coffee... when you're coming home from the swing shift at the steel factory. Those smarty pants at Microsoft and Amazon.com need coffee to wake up in the morning for a hard days' work dominating the universe! Yeah!
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Right, Pike Place Market! They throw seafood there. Do they throw seafood at you in Pittsburgh? I didn't think so.
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Smoked salmon dip or Heinz ketchup - which would YOU rather dip your chips in? That's what I thought!
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Let's have a cheese off: I'll take Cougar Gold, you take... umm... American cheese?
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You think Washington apples are boring? Try a Walla-Walla Sweet onion. Slice one, cook it up reeall slow in butter over medium-low heat, add a 1/2 teaspoon of paprika and 1/4 teaspoon of chipotle pepper, mix with 1/2 cup mayonnaise and 1 cup sour cream in Cuisinart, salt to taste, and wow! Seattle Onion Dip.
* I have no evidence to back up this claim. [Photo Sarah Gilbert]
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