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Collard greens, the soul food way: I'm just not that into you

collard greens the soul food wayI've read any number of pieces waxing rhapsodic about collard greens cooked the soul food way - about how delicious was the "pot likker" (I've really seen it spelled that way! honest!), about how wonderful the house smelled when you set the smoked pork products to cooking. About how nothing says comfort like the rich, tender, porky piles of essential vitamins and minerals. I doubted, but I figured I must be missing out on something really great. So, on slow cooking day, I set out to make soul food-style greens.

Neither my expensive Italian market nor my lower-priced supermarket had smoked ham hocks (and I was secretly relieved!) but they did have suggestion #2: smoked pork neck.

Here's how the recipe goes: you boil the smoked pork neck in several cups' water for hours until it's falling off the bone. I used one pound, although most recipes call for two. You clean, destem, and chop lots of collards - three to five bunches. I used three. You combine the mess and let it cook, stirring occasionally, until the collards are tender. Salt, pepper and hot sauce to taste.

I just don't love this. I didn't enjoy the smell, and I really could barely finish my serving of collards. My mom liked them, and so did a friend who's into soul food. Everyone else looked at them askance. I'll keep cooking collard greens - but I think I'm going to stick to my Mediterranean-inspired version.

[Photo Sarah Gilbert. And disclaimer: I totally stole the title idea from Love My Crock]

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