There's a lot of buzz about comfort food right now - macaroni and cheese, chicken soup, meatloaf, and doughnuts - things that you crave when you need a little bit of TLC whether it's from a bad day, being sick, or just hungover. The buzz has gotten me thinking about things that are the exact opposite of comfort foods. Does that mean uncomfortable foods? Nah, uncomfortable foods are things like still-wiggling octopus tentacles and scorpions. I was thinking more along the lines of the last thing I want to eat when I need some TLC (but that's not to say that live octopus isn't one of those last things).

1. Salad - Salad really is the opposite of every comfort food I know. It's cold. It's light. It's a little too healthy. Even when it has two cups of oily, fatty, sugary dressing on it, a salad still has all those healthy vegetables with vitamins and minerals, which are probably really good to have when sick. I don't care. I don't want vitamins. At least not from a salad. (And not from a vitamin either.)
2. Sushi - It's raw and it's cold. Sushi is not warm and comforting, and I don't want to cuddle up with it. It reminds me of when I wanted a puppy when I was little and my parents bought me a goldfish instead.   
3. Fresh fruit - "I'm depressed," shouldn't be followed with, "Aw, here, honey, have an apple." That's not right. If the apple is drowning in hot sticky caramel and wrapped in a flaky pastry, maybe I'll feel better. But a fresh apple? See #1, salad. 
4. Wine - When I'm hungover, the last thing I want to drink is wine. Some say that the best way to cure a hangover is with more alcohol, which I totally agree with. That's why I say, "bring me a bloody mary!" not wine.
5. Cookies - This is weird, I know. It's probably only me. In fact, I think I really might be the only one who doesn't want to eat a cookie when I'm sick. When I'm sane, happy, and healthy, I love cookies of every kind, even *ahem* store-bought ones. But if I'm hungover or sick, a cookie sounds dry, like it will take too much effort to chew and swallow. I don't mind the fat and sugar though, which is probaby why a piece of tres leches cake sounds great.