Slashfood Ate (8): Worst things at Trader Joe's

by Stefania Butler, Posted Dec 13th 2005 @ 5:05PM

I know that lots of people love Trader Joe's and wait in anticipation for the monthly Fearless Flyer listing new and sale items. And I get that parents love that it is a source for inexpensive, kid-friendly food.

For those that aren't familiar with Trader Joe's, when I was in college we shopped there because they sold booze, chips, and cheese. For cheap. Sometime in the 90's they expanded to include more grocery items including hermetically sealed produce. It doesn't quite have the selection of a regular supermarket, but they carry lots of foods from around the world (like Thai and Indian) which a lot of markets don't have. Trader Joe's also has a frustrating policy of first selling foods under different labels, and then, as they become popular sellers, branding them under their own house label. (We all know their soy-sesame-flavored dressing is Annie's Goddess dressing don't we?)

I don't exactly hate Trader Joes, but I am...um...annoyed by a lot of the food there. It's just not...good. I go there about 4 times a year for Spicy Cider (great hot), Fage (Total) Greek Yogurt, and European butter which TJ's sells for much cheaper than grocery stores do. But they also sell a lot of food items that I think are extraordinarily bad. For example:

Produce—it's all under plastic, packaged in incredibly wasteful packaging, and it's always past its prime. Two words: rubbery bananas.
Cheap (69 cent/lb.) pasta—you get what you pay for, a gummy, gluey mess. I'm happy to spend the extra dollar to get quality pasta.
"Mojito simmer sauce"—something about a hot mojito makes me want to hurl.
Pre-packaged sushi—it's not sushi, it's fake fish surrounded by rice paste. Gross.
"Three Buck Chuck"—however you feel about Charles Shaw wines, it just seems wrong that they charge $3.00 for it in Oregon because it's "imported" from California
Crab bisque in a can—Yep. The joke's on me for even thinking canned crab soup would be remotely good. It is overwhelmingly salty. Even the addition of half-and-half couldn't help this soup. Avoid.
Packaged Salads—Hi stomach? Meet Salmonella. I got food poisoning while I was pregnant eating one of these. Morning sickness + food poisoning=fun times. Not.
Hummus—Not so yummus. Is it even made from chick beans and tahini? Cuz I am hard pressed to find any of that lemony-sesame taste I love. I guess that's why it comes in so many flavors.

How about you? Care to add to the list? Is there anything you hate at Trader Joe's?

Filed Under: Stores & Shopping, Slashfood Ate
Tags: slashfood ate, stores-and-shopping, west coast

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Reader comments (Page 2 of 2)

12-29-2005 @12:10PM rainey said... I probably have never tried more than 10% of the merchadise at TJs but what I buy there I just love and keep going back for. My favs: the Greek yogurt, pistachio & white choc chip cookies, lemon curd (TJs label but actually made by Elizabethan Products which is *much* pricier), steel-cut oats, Plugra, sweet & hot mustard, Billington sugar, their raw pecan pieces are the perfect size for tossing into baking or oatmeal with zero prep and the vanilla Velamints are 2-calories-worth of toasted marshmallow flavor. Oh, and the citrus-scented Refresh and Nourish spa line of shampoos, conditioners and shower gels are fantastic for the price.

Last time I was in there TJs was also carrying Corn Maiden tamales and empanadas. I'll still get mine from the local farmers market where I can get more variety but if you're not in SoCal, you might want to try them from TJs. I *do*, however, think TJs should be carrying them frozen (as Corn Maiden actually does) for a fresher texture when you steam 'em.
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12-31-2005 @8:48AM christine said... frozen chocolate bananas = frozen chocolate barf

we bought them at the tj's in portland thinking we'd eat them over the 5 days we were there, but ended up leaving all but one of them in the hotel room freezer
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